Today, I was with my kids. We saw a tiny little bug and they started freaking out. Trying to show them that bugs are not scary, I picked it up. It bit me and now I have to go to the doctor because my hand is the size of a balloon. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Overprotective
Today, as I was walking out of a park, I bent to examine a mosquito bite I had. As I looked up, I noticed a nearby couple staring and whispering in abject horror before calling their kids over to get bug-sprayed, pointing me out. Terrified, they immediately complied. It’s not even my worst bite. FML
Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML
Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I tried to pick it off but it crawled into my hand and stabbed my skin with its sharp legs. I screamed like a little girl because I had a centipede on me. FML
Today, my son wanted to be Spiderman. He found the biggest spider he could outside and let it bite his hand. He's staying overnight in the hospital. FML
Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML
Today, I saw a bug on a stranger's arm and as a knee-jerk reaction smacked it. It took me a second before I realized it was actually a loose scab. FML
RIP
Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked, I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML
Healing
Today, I went to the doctor. I had a spider bite that had been getting progressively larger for days. I had been putting Neosporin on underneath the bandage that was on it. The doctor saw my wound and laughed. He said the spider bite was no big deal, but that I was allergic to the Neosporin. FML
Shouldn't you be at the ER?
Today, I finally gave in and agreed to try holding my girlfriend's pet tarantula. The moment I did, it bit me. According to her she’s had him 4 years and he’s never so much as nipped her, never mind a full bite. Lucky me. My hand is twice the normal size and I can feel my heartbeat in it. FML
Hey Scratchy!
Today, I got a mosquito bite under each armpit. FML
Top comments
Jaywin 3
What bug was it? I mean if it looked dangerous you should've known but if you thought it was a ladybug or something harmless, then that's just bad luck.
i_am_tiff_21 0
Next time listen to your kids. I hate bugs except for ladybugs, butterflies, and caterpillars.
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Comments (80)
Maddisonboii 0
You should have thrown the bug on the child, then told him to stop being a baby
Carosello 0
ooh too bad it wasn't a radioactive spider O.O >_>
fatfaceunited 0
#10 Spiders are bugs, they aren't insects
protooler31 0
you mean, ARACHNIDS? "bug" is a generic term that includes both insects and arachnids.
Lancerman7449 0
way to be OP haha
mattmag 0
I agree with #13
Nakedsquirrel 5
Next time read up on the little critters that inhabit your home surroundings. Many spiders and insects can actually be pretty dangerous, or if nothing else have very painful bites and stings. Some things should be killed on sight, especially if you find them inside the house.
Demon_Squirtle 0
#4, that isn't the best thing to do, however it's also not ok to say they're all harmless. I can understand that the OG was trying to make her not scared of bugs, because I know so many people over the age of 20 who piss their pants everytime there is an ant, as if it is the end of the world. So, I say make your child not scared of bugs but also don't "make them angry" lets say.
boatiebanter 0
There is a middle ground between freaking out because a bug is in your vicinity and trying to pick it up. Teach your kids not to try to touch bugs because many of them will not appreciate it and bite back. But equally, as long as you're not bugging it, the bug won't hurt you. And #10, they're arachnids. 8 legs. Insects have 6. Bug is a suborder of insects, technically.
deeznutsz 0
way to take one for the team!haha
FMLwin 1
Karma
princessbacon 0
how is this karma? it's unlucky maybe, but could have scarred the children for life!!
inoculated 0
I'm guessing it was a conenose beetle.