Today, I was trying to take my shirt off. It was an awkward fit, so I had to basically wrestle it for five minutes. The kicker was that I was giving my boyfriend a striptease. He laughed so hard and for so long that we never had sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend decided to perform a strip tease for me. As he was stripping out of his clothes, he took his shirt and then pants off first. He was wearing zebra striped knee high socks and underwear. I burst out laughing. He left. FML
Today, in an attempt to spice up our relationship, I tied my boyfriend up and did a striptease for him. I pulled my skirt down over my heels but tripped as I tried to step out of it. Not only did I pull a muscle in my leg but I elbowed him in the groin. So much for spice. FML
Today, I tried to give my husband a striptease for his birthday. I wound up tripping over my own panties and nearly dislocating my shoulder. FML
Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML
Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Today, I started doing a striptease for my husband. He asked me to stop. FML
Today, I took my clothes off in front of my girlfriend for the first time. She made a weird face for a moment, then burst into laughter. She couldn't stop laughing, no matter how hard she tried. FML
Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
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Top comments
Rei_Ayanami 18
Sometimes a funny memory is better than sex.
conrad01 6
Ahh... Laughter truly is the best birth control!
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Comments (98)
rjp1811 0
Thats absolutely terrible and I feel incredible pain FOR you, but seriously, shouldn't that have been one of those funny "relationship moments" that u just laughed off? my exgf got stuck ina turtleneck and after I laughed...I still successfully layed the pipe :) why cldnt ur man?
robc32ca 4
Does awkward fit = way too small?
kristat 14
Even if it fits perfectly when it's on you usually know (if you try clothes on before buying) if something is a pain to take off. If you're going to do a strip tease you gotta wear clothes that are easy or fun to remove. Why do you think real strippers wear tear-away pants?
adaenell 2
Oh so true!
betteryouthanmee 3
First time I ever heard of someone going hard and long without getting any.
safaeita 32
I'd take laughter any day of the week..sounds like it was fun
melodywarner17 0
Maybe you need to buy a bigger shirt...
legpimple 0
It's always cheaper just to make her laugh.
little_one 20
Doesn't matter had..... Nvm
papabear88 6
you will probably have plenty of sex but such a funny moment is likely to be unique