Today, I was told by my mother that the reason she quit her job as a counselor and divorced my dad was because she met someone through work. She works in a prison. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out my mom was getting remarried, to my dad. He's been in prison for five years because he pushed her out a window. FML
Today, my marriage counselor got divorced. FML
Expert level
Today, I found out my marriage counselor is currently going through her second divorce. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad crying. Turns out my parents are getting divorced because my mom had an affair. With a teacher at my school. A female teacher. And the school isn't going to fire her because she's a good teacher. Every day at school I'm going to have to see her. FML
Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML
Today, my parents told me that they received a letter from a prison. Being curious they opened it up and read the entire thing. It was from this girl I randomly met. Now I have a prison stalker and my parents think I date felons. FML
Today, I was fired from my job. Why? Because my boss has been dating my newly divorced mother, and he didn't want family get-togethers to be "awkward." FML
Today, I found out that my mother was having an affair with my boss "to help me keep my job" because she thought I was useless. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is seeing a marriage counselor. With her ex. FML
So, how've you been?
Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML
Top comments
chickchick_fml 0
Okay, but did she say it was a prisoner?
lyndis_fml 0
You moron, do you honestly believe your mother is the only employee of the prison? Yeah. Other people work there too. Unless you're saying there's something wrong with prison employees (which includes your own mother), you're a ******* dumbass.
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Comments (71)
Seventytimeseven 0
I'm sorry OP but this is awesome, for of course everyone who isn't you... lol
FJT 0
probably better a prisoner than a guard! unless they raped or murdered someone!
DameGreyWulf 1
You know there's such things as mistrials, yes? And that there's a lot of unecessary sentencings, yes? Not everyone's a murdering, drug-addicted rapist in prison.
PaigeCPony 0
I didn't realize prison guards were so hated. My ex's uncle was a prison guard, and he was one of the most honest, hard-working, ethical men I've ever met. Is he an exception or something?
royboh 0
Yes.
Ninjaface 0
Well, if she likes it in the rear, she couldn't have found a better catch.
ladiesman14 0
a female prison hopefully ? if not i just read an articile about all of charles mansons kids he put up for adoption. do you have any stepborthers or sisters ?
COBRAMORPH 0
She = *****
hayhaysunshine95 2
wow yah my mom married a guy from prison and he beat me with a hairbrush there divorcing now but i wish u good luck
WUTBM 1
She quit her "Job as a councellor" she "works in a prison" shes a prison councellor then?
Rainyy 0
Exactly what I was thinking... This FML doesn't make sense.
jackabilly 5
dude this happend to me too like wtf