By Stinky and Single - 06/08/2015 23:14 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML
I agree, your life sucks 24 696
You deserved it 6 638

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Top comments

'Love is in the air'- wait, no, that isn't love... :-(

It's never safe or nice to let one rip in a coffee shop .. FYL but also YDI

Comments

Coffee farts are the worst. ...

It's never safe or nice to let one rip in a coffee shop .. FYL but also YDI

What about bathrooms

Lol.. like he doesn't fart. He should have worn a radiation suit tho, cause the gas was toxic. Don't fart in a confined space, OP.

It's not the fart #3... It's the power of the fart

Wow, must have been a level 7 fart! You have power!

At LEAST a 7

You're the reason we can't have nice things...

How is this relevant?

This phrase doesn't work in this scenerio.

Aw this is just one of those situations that there's nothing you could of done. But if he was really that bothered by a bodily function everyone goes though maybe you're better off without knowing him. You'll meet someone eventually! Don't worry op.

She could have used manners. Yes, it's natural, but it belongs in the restroom.

Sometimes a fart can build up that's incredibly painful and you feel like you can't move unless you let it out. Waddling to the toilets to do a fart will look like OP just shit themselves or is about to.

Going to the bathroom just to fart seems pointless. Especially if it's just a little nothing toot.

"better off without knowing him"? idk about you but it took me over a year to finally be able to fart in front of my bf. Farting is something natural, yes, but it's also something very private to many. ...oh look at me talking so seriously about farts..

Yeah but OP didn't think anyone would notice and didn't expect him to come up then - I am sure if he had been talking to her before she farted she would have held it in or something

Everyone farts. And I don't know a single person who goes to the restroom to do it. I realize the men in my family might release a bit more noxious gas then others (they are horrific) but I would never judge someone because of a fart smell surrounding them. It can be awful, it can make you gag and possibly want to stop breathing, but it's not unhygienic nor is it horrible manners to release it when your gut starts cramping.

You do realize when you breath in a fart, you're quite literally inhaling shit particles? Not saying it's unnatural, but fuck girl, in a public place? Just because it's natural doesn't give you a pass to be a disgusting fuck.

56, seriously? idk about you, but I'd rather die of embarrassment because of that fart than actually die from holding the fart. What? do you fart pretty little daisies? Didn't think so!

Next time.... oh who am I kidding there won't be a next time if you keep with these poor hygiene habits.

"poor hygiene habits" you don't fart?

He does but it smells like febreeze.

I follow the fluffy method. When I fart it smells like cinnamon.

If you eat clean, your farts are odorless. Specifically, if you eat a clean, plant-based diet.

#24,I don't know who told you that, but I've been in the presence of a veggie fart, and they're absolutely revolting.

@24. that's bunk. broccoli farts are the worst

Farts just tend to come at the wrong times, I swear.

someone is in the room, you feel the fart coming; they leave, the fart goes away -,- and don't forget the part where they come back and you feel like farting again!! lol

'Love is in the air'- wait, no, that isn't love... :-(

Lol this made me laugh! You will find someone soon!

OP never said she was searching

Searching was implied. Maybe she's not actively searching, but obviously searching on some level. edit: I think I can squeeze the word searching one more time into this comment.