Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was talking to a cute guy at my house party and had to fart. Luckily, it was silent. Unluckily, he smelled it, thought my house had a gas leak, and ran to the basement to check the pipes and ensure our safety. FML
Today, I've been into this guy at work forever, and we've been flirting more and more lately. Today he came up behind me, but I didn't see him. He said "Hi!" and scared me so bad that I farted. FML
Today, I was at the library studying. There was a really cute guy across the room. I decided to play it cool and walk his way and grab some water. Right as I walked by, my body decided to let out the loudest fart. He laughed. I kept walking and asked my friend to grab my books. FML
Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop when the guy stood behind me let out a huge fart, then walked away. The rest of the line turned around, thinking that it was me. An old lady started to lecture me about being rude, while the guy who did it laughed behind his mask in the corner of the shop. FML
Today, I noticed a guy checking out my ass in the mirror behind the bar where I work. He was cute, so I thought I'd put on a little show. I bent over to reach for something near the floor, which caused me to let rip a series of uncontrollable farts, like popping bubble wrap. He quickly left. FML
Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML
Today, I was sitting next to the guy I am trying to get close to while we were at the bar. Music was playing, so I thought that while his attention was diverted I would sneak out a yawn. Just as I did so, the music went silent and I let out a tremendous burp. FML
Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod, and leaves. FML
Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML
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Top comments
chaseafterwind82 29
'Love is in the air'- wait, no, that isn't love... :-(
MrSarary 26
It's never safe or nice to let one rip in a coffee shop .. FYL but also YDI
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Comments (65)
middlenamefrank 8
I thought girls didn't do that???
Insanemf18 12
There goes your innocence
Soverain 15
You would have been better off going to the bathroom to fart.
Baron_Kaz 15
Why would some one run if there was a bad smell in the air? What evidence is there that a particular person farted? It could be rotting food in the restaurant. Just saying...
Blah123459876 3
girl farts smell like pumpkin bread
peachykeen93 17
Ew, go to the bathroom next time! No one wants to share that with you!
mbock 15
that's actually impressive
worldclassrager 41
That's what restrooms are for... Maybe you two will cross paths again there...then things can change
__coralbell 15
As my dad puts it "you gotta go when you gotta go"
Ivy_Kun 14
I was expecting a guy telling this story but this is even more interesting.
tiredofwaiting 25
You would have been better to excuse yourself to the restroom.