Today, I was randomly selected for a pat-down while at the airport. Being from the south, I said thanks out of pure habit. The guy replied, "No sir, thank YOU." and winked. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML
Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML
Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML
Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML
Today, I went to the cinema. The lady at the reception gave me my ticket and wished me a good screening. My reply? "Thanks, you too." FML
Today, while working at a bank, I helped a customer who was making a large withdrawal. After I counted out his money, I asked "Do you want the strap on?" After a moment of awkward silence, as I realized how that came out, he smiled and said, "No thanks, I don't need one." and winked. Great. FML
Today, I got looked at weirdly for brushing my teeth in an airport bathroom. FML
Today, I was walking across a pedestrian crossing and waved at the driver of the car who'd stopped, just to say thank you. She stuck her middle finger up at me. FML
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Top comments
CobraLazerFace 21
Did he happen to have a bitchin' stache and sunglasses on?
WCARlover 35
So, when's the wedding?
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Comments (86)
Neta 16
At least you were "randomly selected". :/
Lockjaw2k 5
I so would have done that.
vlalam 24
Oh wow, he selected u for a purpose I bet ;)
SnowFangedBeauty 19
Hope he at least took you to dinner first
Caelophile 8
As a native Marylander, I'm offended that you consider Maryland to be "the South."
rocker_chick23 27
As a native Marylander, I am offended that you were too stupid to realize he is either visiting Maryland, or was born in the South and moved up here.
martin8337 36
Full body cavity search. Don't stop until the back of the throat is reached.
rocker_chick23 27
My husband used to do that all the time when they said "thank you "just to troll the people. xD
DatWeirdoDoe 9
Hah GAAAYEEE. OP maybe he ment it in a way where he was saying thank you for not having any weapons?
Calfml2 8
was there cheesy 80s music playing in the background?
Zverina 20
So people in the south all say thanks out of habit?