Animals: Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!"... - FML

By Anonymous - 20/05/2009 20:22 - United States

Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!" Without thinking, I replied, "You too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 291

You deserved it 44 876

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By emma_waters23 - 26/04/2013 00:11 - United States - Long Beach

Today, I was walking my dog. A cute guy stopped me and said, "Wow, you are gorgeous!" I said thanks. He looked at me like I was nuts and said, "Not you, your dog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 830

You deserved it 6 005

Doggos 4 Life

By Jerry01 - 19/11/2024 03:00 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, in the middle of what I thought was an empty park, I told my dog he’s the “goodest, bestest boy” while out on a walk. A stranger appeared out of nowhere, gave me a thumbs-up, and said, “You too, champ.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 151

Mistaken identity

By thedogwalker - 09/08/2020 08:02

Today, I was out walking my dog, when a lady called out to me asking, “Is that a boy or a girl?” Assuming she meant the dog, I told her that he was a boy. When I turned away, I heard her say to her kid, “I was talking about the person walking the dog, but whatever,” then audibly laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 501

You deserved it 209

Bad boy

By PicklesMcRaptor - 25/03/2012 11:59 - United States - Miami

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 711

You deserved it 3 591

By TrulyYours - 07/05/2009 12:39 - United States

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 559

You deserved it 5 915

By Anonymous - 25/04/2015 22:46 - United States - Bowling Green

Today, while out walking with my son in a stroller, a couple passed by and the girl smiled sweetly at him. It made me really happy, until we passed and I heard her say "What? You're supposed to smile at babies, even if they look weird." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 633

You deserved it 2 700

Doggy dog world

By Whatever - 24/09/2021 08:00

Today, my self-esteem has gotten so low that when I was out walking my boss's dog and someone called out, "Beautiful!" I assumed they were talking about the dog. They had to clarify they were speaking about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 940

You deserved it 169

By fmlman - 15/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Rawlins

Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 384

You deserved it 6 389

By anon - 19/06/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, I took my dog for a walk. It became friendly with another dog, and I reached down to pet them both. Suddenly, an old woman runs up to me and whacks me with her cane repeatedly. Apparently, her previous dog had been kidnapped by a woman who looked a lot like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 247

You deserved it 2 814

By Momo8612 - 21/04/2017 12:00

Today, while shopping for groceries, a small child pointed at my face and exclaimed : "DOGGIE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 689

You deserved it 306

Next

Top comments

Minorchord 4

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:06

I bet she didn't have a dog, did she...

BitterJaded 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:10

If you think your life is ****** because of this.......wow. I'll trade you lives.

Comments

Minorchord 4

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:06

I bet she didn't have a dog, did she...

ReyEr9412 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 16:38

Not an FML.

ilovefatcats 12

Saturday 20 March 2010 23:14

what happend to "thanks"?

Gorsbug823 0

Wednesday 7 July 2010 7:30

how is this an fml?

lolfood 24

Saturday 22 December 2012 8:54

Nah, she has a pussy.

CHILL222 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:06

ha, i would hav done that too.....at least u were bein nice

lrsmith312 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 5:13

thatta kid :D

FukedOver 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:07

thats kind of a lame FML... you look like a dumbass for a few seconds to a minute but your life is not ******

aFMLaddict 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:09

hahah..fyl seriously, she looked like a dog to you?

BitterJaded 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:10

If you think your life is ****** because of this.......wow. I'll trade you lives.

Carlie_McCartney 1

Sunday 10 October 2010 2:22

ditto!:D

icrest80 4

Tuesday 18 September 2012 2:53

*****! :D

nomorehope 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:10

bahaha , i hate it when that happenss ;p

abinator412 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:11

ain't that a bitch

bonafidehustler 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:12

Haha I like this one. Even though it's not a really bad FML, it's something I'd totally do so it made me laugh. When cute girls compliment my dog, I always say something stupid and awkward back, and I make an ass out of myself.

Synnie 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:12

There's a Dane Cook joke on this. :3 Or I think it was Dane.

Akazuki 26

Wednesday 23 May 2012 6:07

I don't know about Dane Cook, but I know Brian Regan had a joke about "you too!".

T9FTW 20

Thursday 8 November 2012 4:48

DANE!!! LIKE GREAT DANE!!!! Oh... OP, that's definitely something I would do!

omglyktotally78 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:12

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

DIY Cats Family Miscellaneous Poopoo peepee Work Management Awkward Relatable Coworkers Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Love Dating Mental health Anxiety Technology Health Sleep Roommate Clumsy Noise Confused AITA Parents

The Top

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 64

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 711

The Top

Today, while in a parking lot, I accidentally cut someone off out of pure nervousness as I'm a new driver. I got out of my car to apologize, and they responded by beating me and my car to a pulp with a baseball bat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 542

You deserved it 459

Today, I asked my mother why she had me in the first place, as we never get along. She replied because my father wanted me. So, I called my father to ask him the same question, he said he only wanted to have me to keep my mother around, and that didn't work, so I was a waste. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 955

You deserved it 4 546

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 478

You deserved it 9 866

Today, while opening up to a few friends about how I was sexually abused as a child, one of them blurted "Pics or it didn't happen." How did the others react? With outrage? No, just with awkward chuckling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 206

You deserved it 2 091

Today, I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money, saying it was collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then used his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and won 500 dollars. The jackass wouldn't split it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123 263

You deserved it 18 234

Today, I was grocery shopping. When I got to the frozen foods, I saw some Lean Pockets, which I haven't had in forever, so I bought a couple of boxes. Around lunch time, I was hungry and thought I could have some, until I realized why I stopped buying them: I don't have a microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 207

You deserved it 40 998