Today, I was not yet wearing my bouncer uniform when a fight broke out at a club. I intervened, only to have the cops who showed up tase me because they thought I was part of it. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I'm recovering from being pepper-sprayed, beat with a baton and Tased, and arrested for assault. I'm a bouncer and was trying to remove a drunk asshole from the bar when the police showed up. FML
Today, someone was getting beat up by 6 guys. When I tried to help, they had a swing at me as well. The cops came when I was enthusiastically defending myself. They got away, I got arrested. FML
Today, while working as a plain clothes police officer, I witnessed a fight in a front yard. My partner and I intervened and clearly identified ourselves as police. Unfortunately, the two guys' mother didn't have her hearing aid in, and hit my arm with a baseball bat. FML
Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML
Today, whilst presenting a report to the head of my college, I was arrested by a police officer for assault. I was in a bar the night before and accidentally bumped into a local tough guy on the way to the toilet. I got punched in the face. The witnesses got our names mixed up. That'll look great on my CV. FML
Today, I got questioned by the police. Last night I was at a party when a bully of a kid who happened to be an aspiring MMA coach and local fighter was picking on me, stole my alcohol and threw me out of the party. I heard he got stabbed by someone else he was picking on after I left. The police insist it was me. FML
Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML
Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML
Today, I got mugged at work. The sad thing is I'm a cop and was trying to catch the people who mugged me previously while off duty. FML
Today, I got bailed out of jail. I was there because I saw a girl being hit by her boyfriend. I rushed over to help only to have her hit me repeatedly. The cops came and she blamed her bruises on me. The boyfriend corroborated her story. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
xxAlli 0
why wouldn't you have had your uniform on before you got to the club?
matanblum 3
Nothing is hotter than an electrifying bouncer whose not afraid to fight
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (77)
TheJashinist 8
Aren't you supposed to be wearing uniforms before going into work? Anyway, I'm giving this a YDI and a FYL for obvious reasons.
emilyjgraham 34
how does he deserve it? he might have just got the club he works at and a fight could have broken out before he even had time. also, there's loads of people that are either required or by choice leave their uniform behind. like someone said on a thread above, not everyone likes to advertise their a bouncer or a doctor even because people instantly look to them in alarming situation and maybe they font
emilyjgraham 34
don't * want to be appointed leader of a situation. this is completely understandable, he's obviously a big enough size for someone to instantly think he's a threat and sometimes bouncers can't just pick someone up by the scruff of the neck, they have to use brute force.
jwebster 8
Ya know in Florida bouncers are trained to not be affected by that. At least the ones in the titty bars are.
klutzyduck1 24
If it's a real taser that shoots probes (and not a stun gun), you can't train your body to not respond. It targets the muscles and contracts them involuntarily by creating an arc for the electricity between the two probe spreads. It works on bulls, I'm positive it works on bouncers. You tube it, people have tried to fight it.
good2know 0
Batman trained himself. And he's just a man.
linkinpark98 24
I've always wondered what being tazed would feel like.... I'm a weird person.
IbizaNightclub 3
Hot.
Vkins 9
Things like this only happen in the US, seriously.
j_cat187 20
I am pretty sure more horrible events occur outside of the US.
wolfshadow 4
Events more horrible, yes. Events this ridiculous, no.
wdd2 5
Wtf? Tentomon is the only one allowed to use super shocker. Not human policemen.
bootyful86 7
Don't tase me bro!
BcICan08 1
you're right fyl, but you'll know better next time won't ya.
daizttgg 9
Yea don't feel bad my friends brother is a jackass and when I went to go get her they (his friend) chased me and my two friends down the road with tasers laughing
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Always wear the proper attire when doing your job.
indigo964 3
Bouncers have uniforms?