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BabyG2222 Say more :
OP here, Okay just want to clarify some stuff first. The term "spank the ferret" is a "nice" way of putting he was jerking off. I originally wrote "jerked off" but I guess fmylife didn't like that wording and changed it to a friendly term. So, no there wasn't an actually ferret (no animal was hurt in the making of fmylife). Okay with that done now for the background story. My boyfriend at the time loved sex (like every normal guy) and liked to do the "traditional porn ending, where the guy cums on the girls face" He liked to call it Spiderman. (I'm aware doing the Spiderman is not done that way however he didn't want to splat in his hand and throw it at me, it was a modified Spiderman). Anyways, he got this "bright" idea to wake me up this way (thinking I was find it funny and sexy at the same time, which I didn't.) And for all of you who said I should have helped him out, I was sleeping, he woke me up just before and when I turned around SPLAT he shot me in the face while singing the theme song. We broke up a month later because of an unrelated issue but needless to say I was pretty mad at him but forgave him like after a day.
By BabyG2222 / Saturday 29 September 2012 09:14 / United States - Sturgeon Bay
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By  winnerme123  |  8

Time for a new one then.( Unless you like that, but you probably don't since it's on FML.)

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There is absolutely nothing wrong with a little role playing in the bedroom! Next time join in you jerk.

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  winnerme123  |  8

Well as you can tell... She didn't like it. So talk, stop, or breakup.

By  SpringDiver  |  6

I agree with the first comment

By  Theporcelaindoll  |  1

Why do u sleep with a ferret in the first place? o.o

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  starbursty  |  0

Chocking the chicken? Spanking the farret? Beating your meat? Really?

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  _krystallynn_  |  11

HAHAHA greatest comment ever lol. im only 15 and i figured out what that meant. :P

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  NeonPopRocks  |  14

-COUGH- BLONDE! -COUGH!-

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  Athleticism  |  11

Yeah, your 15 an you can't capitalize your i and can't put an apostrophe between I and m.

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  NeonPopRocks  |  14

I knew that was gonna get buried.

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  Athleticism  |  11

Jesus Christ. I need to read over my comments.

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  Athleticism  |  11

My comment looked like a piece of grammatical shit. I apologize for that.

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  kakkyman  |  4

I'm turning 14 next week and I understood it.

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  Athleticism  |  11

129- I already apologized. I saw how bad my comment looked.

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  Trix_Disorder  |  20

It's more like "Look how young and sexually knowledgable I am! Go me!" It seems like a good idea at that age, but it comes off... A bit skanky to me. Why would you want to brag about that at 13? 14? Kids are in such a hurry to grow up.

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  jmacfan1  |  16

I'm 21 and I've never heard the term spank the ferret before. I finally understood after I finished reading the fml, but at first I thought op had a pet ferret. I was like what the....oh

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  cetlawizard  |  15

Wow 129, obviously you can't tell the difference between your (as in yours/ belongs to you) & you're (as in you are/ being/doing something).. They said "capitalizing your i & putting an apostrophe between the i & the m (to make I'm)...also, there's a difference between grammar nazi's & spell checkers/correctors.....the 1st gripes that the WORDS in a sentence are in correct order, comma/apostrophe,question mark, exclamation point, etc. (according to school teachings) & the 2nd gripes about SPELLING only..lol ...that's sum edjamucation u got ther!

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  Allanahjoy  |  7

He was correcting the 'your' when he said "your 15 an..." So he was actually right about that. How about stop trying to show off and talk down about someone when you are clearly just as wrong.

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  _krystallynn_  |  11

okay guys, I was just saying that i understood it. its not a big deal. I'm not writing a letter to the goddamn president. this is a website, nobody's trying to be all formal. i cud b tlkin lyke dis all da timee nd spllin lyke im on crack,, but I'm not. its nothing you need to flip out about. why is everyone so rude here?

By  snowfox_fml  |  10

The excitement has to be kept up somehow..

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  saIty  |  17

Glad I could give you a chuckle. I read the simba joke somewhere but I'm not sure where. I just wanted to share it with the FML community.

By  rebel_belle1974  |  5

is ferret your pet name for penis?

By  teresee  |  8

What?

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