By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:56 - United States - Huntington Park

Spicy
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML
I agree, your life sucks 82 466
You deserved it 9 862
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Comments

ElatedEarthling 15

Its not too bad. First time making out and he almost got a hand job. Who knows what's in store for the second time? (if there even is a second time)

88 5
limitedition 25

Sounds a little soul crushing. Hopefully next time will go better for you.

182 5
Blacksabbath211 9

Sounds like you've got a little problem there ;-)

339 9
rg350dx 29

That's a Tiny bit of a low blow don't you think?

97 5
Blacksabbath211 9

28- I didn't see what you did there for a sec...I must appear to be going soft in the head

98 3
MistySky 17

It might be hard to tell, but this is getting a little out of hand here... :x

82 3
Blacksabbath211 9

33- I think it's very safe to say this is not likely to grow into a large issue ;)

77 3
flockz 19

i wonder how OP feels knowing the thread of puns making fun of his little guy is now longer than it will ever be.

85 3
isallwaysme 27

Hey. Don't make fun of a guy with a tiny penis. Having a tiny penis is like having a disability. You wouldn't make fun of someone in a wheelchair now would you?! Wait a minute.. This is FML, who am I kidding.

65 6
TrueTriage 16

33 speaking of hand jokes. Who wants to start this off? Orhando Bloom? Jennifer Handiston?

16 48
Blacksabbath211 9

58- Dr. HANDible Lector

20 12
AngelSpit 18

I got to hand it to you guys this thread is a head above the rest. i feel bad OP got shafted but look on the bright side I'm sure other good things will -come- your way, you'll see(men) this through :)

13 33
Brockulus 4

Well at least you both had some hands on experience in such a Hard situation.

9 0
HiIAmKevin 8

I thought it would be that band from a few years back. You know, HANDson?

6 0
sabrinaacrow 26

Do some penis exercises to make it grow more

135 13
AbstraktThoughts 13

It's not about how big it is, it's about how you use it ;)

53 9
sabrinaacrow 26

I'm pretty sure the exercises would help with that too ;)

49 3
twinkiefeets 17

18-- it's ALL about how big it is. Anyone saying it's how you use it is lying.

23 80
Poppipuff 14

18- That's what people with small ones say.

45 9
falafalo 25

It's not the size of the ship or the motion of the ocean, it's whether or not the captain stays in port long enough to get all of the passengers off.

88 0
EsotericBrent 29

"Looks like a needle, moves like a sewing machine."

27 2
Wizardo 33

Well you should've whipped it out and showed her, then proceed to the next base with all the skill and grace of a hard man ;)

151 3
tnlander 20

Some times you just can't fight genetics.

11 0
sig4life 18

Time for the **** pump. But first time making out, skipping bases already, he just should've whipped it out to show her. This kids and their baggy jeans.

4 1
noobsatin 19

that sucks. but at least, well there really isn't an at least on this one.

14 44