Intimacy: Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time,...

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:56 - United States - Huntington Park

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 522

You deserved it 9 874

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Same thing different taste

By illequipt - 16/03/2009 03:20 - Canada

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204 700

You deserved it 32 090

By arctic1 - 27/05/2009 09:45 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 340

You deserved it 68 785

Feelings

By Anonymous - 29/07/2013 00:46 - United States - Beaumont

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 667

You deserved it 9 812

Like a virgin

By chchboy - 22/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 187

You deserved it 7 135

Peaked

By herve - 22/05/2009 19:50 - Lebanon

Today, my girlfriend of two years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 157

You deserved it 11 643

By sixsix - 24/12/2008 11:19 - France

Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 220

You deserved it 8 686

By whatswrongwithit?:( - 30/09/2012 19:37 - United States - Chicago

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 526

You deserved it 3 682

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 033

You deserved it 19 194

By Anonymous - 30/06/2019 16:06

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I started to put my hands down his pants and jokingly said, "Sorry, I'm not very good at hand jobs." He replied, "I know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 964

You deserved it 814

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 638

You deserved it 91 122

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 24 April 2013 23:44

You sure were hard... Hard to find.

cuddly_scorpion 4

Wednesday 24 April 2013 23:36

Well, shit.

Comments

Wildghost123 13

Sunday 13 April 2014 17:55

one way to ruin a man's ego

kelseeyo 8

Wednesday 25 June 2014 4:10

sharklover2017 11

Thursday 21 August 2014 19:01

If you're wearing jeans, that's completely understandable! I hate those things, always hiding boners. Maybe next time, wear sweats. And if it's not her first time feeling up a guy, I'm sure she'll find it..

KarlTheLlamma 8

Friday 10 October 2014 5:59

yeah, jeans make it weird, back in my good old innocent days I thought I'd never given my bf a boner..... he wore some really obnoxious jeans

MissHeartSihk 26

Tuesday 16 September 2014 19:46

This is horrible.

Countryboy1996 18

Thursday 4 June 2015 11:17

You poor thing. I'm so sorry.

DLBL 21

Wednesday 24 June 2026 0:26

I encountered a micro-penis once. I felt so sorry for the guy! "Hard," it was the size between my index finger and pinky finger. My hand could entirely contain it. As an aside, his last name had "wood" in it, like "Woodside" or "Woodruff" or something, I forget. This would be funnier if his name was "Woodcock" but as a tragedy to comedy, it was not. I was not unkind to the poor guy, no reason for cruelty for something he could not help. Anyway, micro-penis can be treated by a doctor. It's not your fault.