Work: Today, I was let go from my balloon-selling job at the zoo. They...

By Anonymous - 23/03/2011 11:50 - United States

Today, I was let go from my balloon-selling job at the zoo. They put a new monkey cage in my designated spot. I was literally fired so a monkey could take my place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 065

You deserved it 5 086

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Volunteer - 13/09/2013 22:24 - United States - Elwood

Today, I got fired from my volunteer job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 031

You deserved it 11 031

Animalistic

By 00anon00 - 02/07/2020 02:01

Today, I was fired from my local animal shelter. I was a volunteer and am currently in school for veterinary technology. My education made the paid staff at the shelter feel threatened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 712

You deserved it 168

By LennyComa - 19/03/2017 00:00

Today, I was punched in the balls by a monkey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 602

You deserved it 943

By upsetandunjustified - 04/11/2010 05:19 - United States

Today, I got fired from my job where you build teddy bears. I got fired not because I did anything wrong, just because they don't like my personality. I'd never worked with my boss, and that means all the employees that work there had a meeting about me, and all confirmed they don't like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 868

You deserved it 6 400

By foojew93 - 09/08/2009 17:41 - United States

Today, I was walking at a section of the zoo where you are in the cage, and the monkeys are climbing outside of the cage. I was having a great time until I looked up and one of the monkeys urinated all over my face. Not only did everyone see, but there was no way for me to shower for six hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 332

You deserved it 3 836

Dumbo's jumbo dungo

By Anonymous - 23/09/2019 20:00 - Australia

Today, I learned not to get a job as an elephant keeper at the zoo when the water at home is out for a week for renovations. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 429

You deserved it 192

Make your minds up

By damngurl - 10/12/2022 18:00

Today, I got fired. Yesterday was my birthday and I was told I was getting a promotion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 129

By secretninja64 - 21/08/2014 03:47 - United States - Saint Francis

Today, I got fired after three days at my new job. They told me it was because of downsizing. They were still interviewing people and had a help wanted sign in the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 800

You deserved it 4 885

By fml - 05/02/2009 11:41 - United States

Today, I got fired from my job. I worked for my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 381

You deserved it 10 952

By Eddy - 27/08/2017 16:00

Today, I was let go at work. About 2 years ago, we had hired an eager-to-learn "assistant" for me. When they canned me, they let me know that I should've trained him faster so I could've been fired sooner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 989

You deserved it 331

amerwin 3

Wednesday 23 March 2011 16:09

I would've gone ape-shit.

bubble25_fml 5

Wednesday 23 March 2011 19:24

I don't know what's sadder, that you were fired and replaced by a monkey, or that you are actually depressed you lost your job as a balloon vendor...

Comments

ckyorelse 18

Wednesday 23 March 2011 17:58

dey took he jeerb!

justysgirl 3

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:11

monkeys are cute :)

khaya 9

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:27

We all know the real reason why you were fired: helium theft.

CatEyes66 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:52

haha

awardZu 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:29

I think your life was F***ed before you got fired. Think about it, you sold balloons. In a zoo.

playboyintown 4

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:35

i wonder what happens to his dick if the balloon bursted.

khaya 9

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:46

He wins the game, and gets to go again.

miss_fab 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:49

that's funny

Nebuwah 8

Wednesday 23 March 2011 18:56

You should be taking this is a good thing. Now you can get a decent job.

Zebidee 8

Wednesday 23 March 2011 19:01

The monkey probably would've been smart enough to move a few feet to the left and keep on selling balloons like nothing ever happened.

Ixlovexwaffles 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 19:48

Win

djnova11 4

Wednesday 23 March 2011 19:10

are you black? haha

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Jealousy Underwear Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, the friend I recommended for a job at my workplace is getting fired for being one of the worst people they have ever hired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 341

You deserved it 856

Today, I had to pick my son up from jail. He was pulled over for having a busted tail light, gave the officer his licence, realized he gave the officer his fake ID and then the dumbass gave the cop his real one. Is it too late for a vasectomy? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 756

You deserved it 496

Today, and for years, we keep getting offers for ultra high speed internet from the new fibre optic cables they put in. Whenever we ask the provider whether these cables are actually physically available at our address, they tell us they don’t know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 108

Today, I was doing homework in the living room when my mom came in and started blasting music and cleaning. When I asked if she could turn it off so I could study, she bitched at me about "My house, my rules." She also has a rule that we can’t do homework in our rooms because of too many distractions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 250

You deserved it 125

Today, I got my license renewed and the woman behind the desk looked at me and said "guess we need to update the weight, huh?". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 085

You deserved it 6 025

Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 544

You deserved it 3 362

Same thing different taste

Animalistic

Dumbo's jumbo dungo

Make your minds up

Top comments

Comments