By Awkward Jeff
Today, I was home alone, so for fun I put red lipstick on. A few minutes later, my doorbell rang. I managed to get it off before I got the door. I saw my neighbor, and had a long conversation with him. After which, I came inside and realized I had lipstick all over my teeth. FML
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By  Mungolikecandy  |  19

You should have just told him you got it off smooching the hooker you had around.