By pride? what's that? :( - 01/09/2012 00:23 - Belgium - Leuven

Spicy
Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks 14 739
You deserved it 40 287

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Was the doctor atleast anal about the proceure? All pieces removed?

I'm not even thinking about the hospital trip. I'm trying to figure out how the ride there went.

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Was the doctor atleast anal about the proceure? All pieces removed?

Procedure*. So close.

How is a dildo 'special'? Is it set to the right vibration frequency to please you, or?

Perhaps if it was gigantic, or oddly shaped, or her favorite? Not sure really.

I'm not even thinking about the hospital trip. I'm trying to figure out how the ride there went.

Proof that what goes up does not always come down.

Or you could get a real boyfriend, just a thought.

I remember reading something similar to this on Docbastards website :$

Imagine being the doctor on call that night, thinking his rough day couldn't possibly get any worse...and then OP walks in.

Didn't docbastard have his profile photo of a man with a coke bottle up his ass? People are crazy.

Well when my grandmother was in her mid 20's apparently my grandfather got her a glass sliding and later that night he was called to the hospital because she got it stuck very similar to this .... .... Yeah my family is very open X_X

*dildo not sliding

L..O..L!!!

9- Maybe she means special as in she doesn't use it as often as her other ones? Or it's for when she really needs that orgasmic boost for the day?

39- I doubt OP was even able to walk.. maybe the walk of shame

Maybe this special one is particularly good at listening to her and knows what she wants.

How did it get stuck?

I am not sure she is a she... I think this Op is Male.

39 - Waddles*

It's a female.

Doesn't it seem like it's her "special" dildo because she uses it for her ass?

#175, *She's

Maybe it's a limited edition dildo, signed by One Direction or JB?

honestly i was kind of thinking the same thing a bit. Just seems like a very weird thing to happen.

Don't feel bad OP, everyone has their days. You'll be happy :)

I think once OP sticks to using her special dildo for her vagina she will be VERY happy.

Dildo removed from asshole? How the hell is OP single/lonely? I think she's a keeper...

I feel sorry for the doctor.Damn doctors have to deal with a lot of shit!

What's is op

82: I was thinking the same! Nothing quite like a Belgian lady who's not afraid to "help herself".

I am not sure that it is a lady... Could be a Guy... OP doesn't say either way.

173- There is a gender sign on the right side of the FML. Pink for female and blue for male.

Don't know where you see that, I just see the word "woman" after the op's name.

Not so special now huh..

Maybe this was another case of a possessed dildo - just like the one from yesterday. Be afraid ladies. Be very afraid.

Are you kidding!? What could be more special than getting it stuck in your ass and having it surgically removed?! That's true love, my friend. True love.

Your dildo was probably like "I don't wanna come out I look like shit!" :p lol

A better question is did she get her special dildo back?

It'd be hilarious if something like this came into the ER where DocBastard works.

That's a bit shit.

As was your comment

As were these replies.

No shit Sherlock!

Sherlock....Benedict Cumberbatch....

That's gross

Your reaction is understandable, since you're only 14. Don't worry, once you mature a bit I'm sure stuff like this won't bother you.

fuzz- I am assuming that you are only 14/15 too, since you have 97 in your profile. Don't be a jerk

If you actually looked at my profile instead of assuming things, 90, you would know that I am 17 and my comment is entirely justified.

90- Wrong. He's 17. Check the actual information ON his profile.

People lie, just saying.

Can't we all just get along?

Think about it this way, 106. If I was 14 or 15, why would I have left that comment?

I love how hockeychickl003 tried to defend herself by saying people lie because she can't read.

#107, are you Canadian by any chance?

Wow 17, Fuzz? Please enlighten us more. Better yet, keep your mouth shut at least until you've moved out of your parents' house because you don't know jack.

That's mean 132.

I'm 14. I didn't even wince. 132- Hey, looks like I'm slightly more mature than you are, considering I don't make blanket statements.

Cuz ur stupid

Being mature isnt about accepting sexual shit like anal sex experience.. He is conscious enough to remember actively that there is shit in the anus.. Even if there isnt, the anus still had shit and is made to handle shit.. Since when does ... not thinking about the poop in the anus= being more mature?? Because The only way people stop thinking about the shit in the anus during sexual experiences is when they think about sexual pleasure instead-.- and this relates to the way people can choose to do things like eating ice cream even though it has been dropped on the floor .. Or having sex with someone else even though you have a boyfriend.. There is a contradiction and a impurity that makes it all disgusting in SOME way.. And contradictions to true love dont go away just because you get a bf/gf.. Being mature isnt about being unconscious about things.. Or sex.. It is about being stronger in more ways than one .. For yourself and for those you love and want to protect and make happy and such... Not about accepting anal sexual shit Because being mature is about reaching a level of intelligence.. But that level of intelligence doesnt have to be about accepting anal shit.

I wasn't aware people had special sex toys. But OP, there's other ways to cheer yourself up than drinking.

Yeah, like shoving things up your ass, oh wait...

Come to think about it, isn't alchohol a depressant?

You know a depressant isn't a thing that makes you depressed, right?

All my sex toys are special.

86, if already depressed, a depressant will make you more depressed

Fuck alcohol, sober up and smoke a bowl.

I agree with 158 :)

Life's a bitch:/

Well if it were a whore it would be easy.

37, haha yes

And is death her sister?

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

*Looks at top right of screen, and notices the female sex logo*

Dildos are made for women in mind for the most part. if I guy were to show up with a dildo up his ass, even if gay, it would be 100% more awkward of a situation.

Somehow I think stuck sex toys would be equally humiliating for either gender.

Well, honestly anal might be better for guys. The prostate is pretty much a g spot and can generally only be reached by anal stimulation. It's just not a commonly accepted thing because, you know, Jesus hates sodomy.

Actually I've experienced a prostate "massage". It's one of the most uncomfortable things I've experienced in my life. To each their own but I could never be gay.

Its still TERRIBLE! Thats why its on here!

Obviously OP is a girl. Open your eyes and look at the gender symbol next to the FML. Before you comment asking maybe you should open your eyes a little

Yes you could, 133, you'd just have to be a Top

Geez, did you go too deep? FYL OP, that would have been insane amounts of embarrassment.

Haha talk about some suction. Lol Welp maybe this will teach her to use a smaller dildo next time.

Or maybe a bigger one so it won't get lost!

Or one with a proper base.

op: excuse me doctor I have a problem doctor: what is it? op: I have a dildo stuck up my ass and I can't get it out

DocBastard- Don't be embarassed, it's casual.

Haha just picture her driving in her car to the hospital