Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my best friend decided she wanted to tell my boyfriend about the time I pissed myself laughing at her house. When she was telling the story I ended up laughing so hard, that I pissed myself again. FML
Today, while eating lunch, one of my friends told a joke that made everyone at the table laugh. Apparently, the guy standing behind me overheard and was laughing too. So much in fact that he spewed the red Gatorade he was drinking all over the back of my white shirt and hair. FML
Today, my friend decided it was funny to burp in my face. The burp was actually vomit. We were in the food court at the mall. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML
Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML
Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant. While the chef was throwing food at us, I was getting ready for my turn. He tossed a piece of broccoli at me, I leaned back to catch it, completely falling off my chair. I knocked everything over and had the packed restaurant laughing at me. FML
Today, I fucked up by trusting the wrong fart and shat myself in the middle of the restaurant I was eating lunch at. I was so mortified, I couldn't even finish the meal I paid for. FML
Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML
Today, while watching YouTube, I was drinking when something funny happened. I laughed, choked, and threw up all over the floor. FML
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Top comments
papertigers_fml 0
Classy.
Jonasgl 0
so what was so funny? ;P
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Comments (125)
Kriegsphilosoph 0
This is just win.
cookydough28 0
Today, I was having a long hard day at work. My shift was over soon and it looked like things wre finally starting to slow down. That is until I had to clean up some idiots' puke and piss. FML
cookydough28 0
Today, my family and I decided to go out for Chinese. We were having a great time and the food was perfect. As we were finishing up, the people at the next table over thought it would be funny to puke and piss all over the table. The smell was awful. FML
newguy12 0
everybody has to understand, reverse Fmls are NOT funny
sbarre1 0
LOL
mirkapepp 0
HAHA!
velocraptor 0
LMFAO makes my day
Nakedsquirrel 5
As if you three weren't pissing everyone off with your noise already. Stop eating at public places.
dramakat11 0
LOL! At least it's a funny story to tell.
ReinaJay 13
well look at the bright side I've read that u can lose some calories just from laughing
juicyjay00 0
haha this is funny, however... i work at a restaurant and if i had to clean that up i would run out of the store and beat you two senseless.