Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML
Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML
Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML
Today, I walked in on one of my co-workers jerking off in the bathroom, complete with heavy breathing and victory groans. I don't want to go to HR, but I can't even look at him anymore. We have to work on a project together next week. FML
Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML
Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML
Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML
Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who is also my boss, was giving me a blowjob at work. Halfway through, his boss knocked on the door and I had to quickly get dressed and slip out the other door. After leaving, I realized that I was still barefoot and I had to walk back to my desk in front of my colleagues. FML
Today, I caught my coworker masturbating in the bathroom. This was during her shift, while I was mopping the bathroom floors. FML
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Top comments
MolesterStallone 13
Sounds like he was doing his own performance assessment!
Icejza_DaChilla 7
*sniff sniff* What's that smell..? It smells like blackmail to me!
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Comments (172)
ByronJess 17
I was reading too fast and read "annual" as "anal". I almost spit my coffee out.
dlcj18 2
That's awesome but still blackmail and extortion is illegal I wouldn't go that route instead of getting a big raise you'll be getting demoted to unemployed
medichick 5
This could either be really good for you or really bad. He could get mad you saw and decide you to give you a bad review. Or he can be embarrassed and give you a good one as long as you keep your mouth shut. Good luck lol
ea247 20
Looks like your getting a rise
govan1107 1
Blackmail him
mrkck 0
During your review flop your happy chap out and do the same thing. Then tell him that you feel that imitation is the most sincere form of flattery.
lexi365 20
That's a sticky situation!
dlcj18 2
Your super cute lol
yancheng 5
this is a funny story
SuzyTurquoiseBlu 25
I don't understand why he wasn't in a cubicle and/or had the door locked.
Dracoboxer357 36
118- Well, if you believe there are no coincidences, then OP's boss Wanted to get caught, even if only subconsciously. Why else would he do that at work, in a restroom that may be commonly used, but not locked in a stall or his own office for that matter. ;P Really, I save my "self entertainment" until I'm at home in the shower or with a door locked if need be. Never had anyone walk in on me yet. :p
sacredeye73 11
And if he doesn't give you a stellar eval, you'll blab all over the office! Congratulations on your pending promotion!