Intimacy: Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss...

By Anonymous - 21/08/2012 17:39 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 599

You deserved it 2 331

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Same thing different taste

By Dhagiik - 24/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Oak Park

Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 141

You deserved it 1 129

By Sleeper_C3ll - 04/02/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 079

You deserved it 2 872

By teaspoonzz - 25/10/2017 15:00

Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 613

You deserved it 282

Wanker

By Sandman2015 - 29/01/2016 18:36 - United States - American Fork

Today, I walked in on one of my co-workers jerking off in the bathroom, complete with heavy breathing and victory groans. I don't want to go to HR, but I can't even look at him anymore. We have to work on a project together next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 351

You deserved it 1 921

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 13:31 - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 325

You deserved it 1 817

Promoted!

By Worst Way To Get Promoted - 25/09/2019 16:00

Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 012

You deserved it 156

Wanker

By fired - 09/08/2013 22:17

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 232

You deserved it 7 477

Not now, mate

By yuen - 16/06/2009 14:59 - Australia

Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 598

You deserved it 4 737

By Walk of Shame - 13/11/2018 22:00

Today, my boyfriend, who is also my boss, was giving me a blowjob at work. Halfway through, his boss knocked on the door and I had to quickly get dressed and slip out the other door. After leaving, I realized that I was still barefoot and I had to walk back to my desk in front of my colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 459

You deserved it 5 992

By OhGodWhy - 29/12/2016 23:30 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I caught my coworker masturbating in the bathroom. This was during her shift, while I was mopping the bathroom floors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 739

You deserved it 875

MolesterStallone 13

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:08

Sounds like he was doing his own performance assessment!

Icejza_DaChilla 7

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:09

*sniff sniff* What's that smell..? It smells like blackmail to me!

Comments

erinchick1 7

Wednesday 22 August 2012 15:35

Tell him you want a promotion AND a raise or you'll tell everyone at work what he does in the bathroom.

FreeDrawn 7

Wednesday 22 August 2012 16:34

it's said to get rid of stress!

athos1237 4

Wednesday 22 August 2012 16:45

You could have offered to help to get a bigger raise. IJS

noisebox 1

Wednesday 22 August 2012 17:18

Better not shake hands.....

Shamus951 2

Wednesday 22 August 2012 17:55

Don't shake his hand!

rammy125 4

Wednesday 22 August 2012 18:09

You should have locked the door behind you and offered to help him finish. He already had a raise, it's time you earned yours

Equin0x 0

Wednesday 22 August 2012 18:43

Payrise or promotion for you then!

BubbaWallace50 0

Wednesday 22 August 2012 19:57

Don't shake his hand!

AwesomeSkySky 1

Wednesday 22 August 2012 21:28

Take a picture, and blackmail him. Just saying

Dravite 9

Wednesday 22 August 2012 21:44

Blackmail Time... alright!

Keywords

Work Capitalism Money Cheating Drunk Love Relatable Health Awkward Concert Music Miscellaneous Friends Coworkers Pranks Intimacy Embarrassing Sextoys Gross Morning Cars Transportation Allergies Cute Food AITA Mental health Medication Annoying Nice Guys

The Top

Today, while riding to the skate park, I noticed a gorgeous blonde walking towards me. She gave me a smile as I passed so I turned and looked behind me to get a second glance. I rode my BMX straight into a light pole in front of a pub patio full of people. She saw it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 994

You deserved it 3 541

Today, my boyfriend invited me over for dinner for the first time. The place was full of his ex's stuff, books on the shelves, makeup in the bathroom, clothes in the closet and even shoes on the floor. Not to mention creepy plush toys staring at me. She left him 8 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 108

The Top

Today, my boss pretty much told me that I'm too ugly to meet clients, and should stay in the office doing the paperwork. So basically, I'm a modern day Hunchback of Notre Dame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 761

You deserved it 3 832

Today, my boyfriend was at my house to hang out. When he was leaving I thought it would be cute to run and jump on him to say goodbye. He fell and hit his head. He is now in the hospital with a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 612

You deserved it 34 047

Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 724

You deserved it 6 243

Today, I got a call from my bank, saying that the cheque I deposited in my account bounced and my account is now -$2900. The cheque was from a work-at-home company, who asked me to deposit the cheque, then send them some of the money through Cash App to buy office supplies. They won’t answer their e-mails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 345

You deserved it 2 782

Today, my idiot boyfriend, who thinks he's an outdoorsman, made sauce from mushrooms he'd foraged. I refused to eat it. He got upset and had two helpings. He's now in bed, whining about how bad he feels. Stupid dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 167

Today, I was on a chat site and a couple of cute guys asked for my "ASL". I had no idea what that meant so I asked one of my cousins. He said it meant "asshole" and that they were calling me an asshole. So I cursed at everyone who was actually asking for my "age, sex and location." FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 1 175

Same thing different taste

Wanker

Promoted!

Wanker

Not now, mate

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