Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down...

By Courtney - 04/02/2012 20:22 - Reserved

Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 464

You deserved it 34 705

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Same thing different taste

By pantyripper - 24/03/2014 12:39 - Australia - Essendon

Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 323

You deserved it 21 693

By Anonymous - 22/09/2011 13:55 - Australia

Today, I was expecting my period. To avoid the embarrassment of everyone in the office finding out, instead of putting tampons in my bag, I hid one in my bra. It fell out while I was coming back from lunch. I am now known to all as "The Tampon Dispenser". FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 956

You deserved it 34 050

Snap!

By fryebaby623 - 13/11/2015 05:47 - United States - Vero Beach

Today, I was so tired when I got home from work, I took off my bra without removing my shirt which I've done so often it is second nature. I successfully removed the bra, then snagged the clasp on a loose shirt thread, causing my bra to take on a life of its own and slap me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 309

You deserved it 3 226

Pick me!

By Anonymous - 13/05/2021 17:01

Today, I wore my tightest, slightly too small, push-up bra and low cut top to impress a guy at work. He came over to borrow a pen. I leaned down to get one out of my bag and my nipple popped out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 277

You deserved it 2 006

By Anonymous - 07/11/2015 05:02 - Canada - Barrie

Today, my 9 year old shitblossom of a sister decided to wake me up by hocking a loogie into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 777

You deserved it 1 847

What are you doing?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 632

You deserved it 12 961

Malfunctioning equipment

By Alyxandrea Loffer - 24/09/2020 01:02 - United States - Ellsworth

Today, at work, my front-close bra popped open like an anime character, right in front of the two male coworkers I was talking to. My boobs flung around and I had to pretend nothing happened while subtly crossing my arms and waiting for them to leave so I could fix it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 581

You deserved it 306

By Kurda - 23/05/2015 02:26 - United States - Wallburg

Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 530

You deserved it 2 768

By Itsbeen8years - 05/04/2015 19:18 - Slovakia - Stupava

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 977

You deserved it 3 875

By brooke - 13/08/2012 04:45 - United States

Today, while out at dinner with my boyfriend, I accidentally ripped out my tampon picking a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 469

You deserved it 25 243

jasony0423 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:18

You're a classy woman, aren't ya?

IIRoxieII 12

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:15

Saving it for later?

Comments

hobojo69 23

Monday 6 February 2012 23:17

Sorry FLY and all but this made me laugh!

sodapopper 6

Tuesday 7 February 2012 5:58

Thats why bitches shouldn't spit.

gren4de 0

Wednesday 8 February 2012 3:59

How ladylike.

Gabby15410 0

Tuesday 14 February 2012 3:23

My,dog threw up,and now its on my knee.,hope you,feel,bettr

loginword123 0

Wednesday 22 February 2012 0:34

What the hell is a loogie

Sir_Swaggington 6

Sunday 7 April 2013 15:49

There is no inconspicuous way to do that. It's loud and gross.

still_guns 16

Wednesday 10 April 2013 17:22

Uhhh, what is hocking a loogie?

me127 17

Friday 9 January 2015 1:00

Now how exactly do u do that?

theFickleFinger 24

Friday 8 January 2016 19:23

What finishing school did you graduate from?

randybryant799 20

Saturday 25 December 2021 7:02

That's disgusting.

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Today, after handing in my resume to get a part-time job, I tried leaving, but the door wouldn't open. It was the "in" door. The person I gave my resume to had to slowly explain this to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 074

You deserved it 25 876

Today, my boss commented on the fact that I don't usually wear makeup, then told me it would be much appreciated if I'd change that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 142

You deserved it 3 478

Today, I asked my husband to watch our kids while I cooked food for him. Apparently I asked in the wrong tone, because now he's pouting and won't eat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 893

You deserved it 390

Today, I have a permanent illness. Whenever I'm too unwell to manage the housework or children, my hubby does even less than usual. As soon as I'm well enough, I have a mountain of work to do, which makes me sick again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 163

You deserved it 143

Today, I found out the reason I can't get a job. My previous employer didn't know my name, so when places I applied to called there for a reference, my boss said he had no recollection of me working there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 995

You deserved it 3 489

Today, after having had a sore throat all day, I finally decided to have a throat lozenge on the bus. It was nice and soothing, until the bus sharply turned a corner and I started coughing and choking on it violently like a cat with a furball. My throat now feels like Satan pissed nails down it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 106