Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squirmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to put up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear and told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML
Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML
Today, two days after losing my temper with my smart mouthed 7 year-old son and slapping him across the face, I tried to apologize by buying him a treat and telling him if anyone found out, I would get in trouble. Today, I got a call from social services about the "bruise" on his face. FML
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML
Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML
Today, at the park, I saw my toddler fall. I rushed over, picked him up, and said, “It’s OK, Mum’s here.” He looked confused. So did his real mum. I had mistakenly grabbed a random child instead of my own in front of everyone. They weren't even wearing similar clothes. FML
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Top comments
mersinary12 0
i bet that went done well with the Kids mother.....
DocBastard 40
Forever, you can't compare molestation and spanking. I was spanked as a child, and I'm not brainwashed or scarred. I have a 4 year old, and while I have not spanked her, once she is old enough to know right from wrong, I will if I need to. Corporal punishment will not land you in jail. Beating your child will. But spanking, no. And I like how you used both "their" and "there" incorrectly in the same sentence. That was amusing.
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Comments (142)
mdog1114 0
lolz
tykiej 0
Oh to have been at that playground! What did the other mom do?
JanisEvans 10
You realised smacking children is against the law these days? OP, you fail as a mother and as a human being.
stitch_book 4
i'm not quite sure if that applies to the US. i know abuse is definitely against the law, but not so sure about "swatting," as it were.
frenchboy95 2
No, it isn't against the law in the USA either. Leaving a bruise or other injury, minor or major, is. I don't know if it's considered abuse if it gets red though. But spankings aren't against the law. Beatings are.
ammo777 0
SPANKING is NOT against any laws you hippy twat... it's called discipline!! And from the looks of most teens now they need a LOT more of it. parents are somehow scared of their own children because most kids now are undisciplined pricks whose parents thought like u and never put them in line with a good old fashioned swat to the ass!!
hazelwolfeyes 0
theres nothing wrong with being swatted..my parents beat the shit out of us constantly..we`d run when we heard the belt coming out of the closet..4 out of the 5 kids turned out great and successful..o.o..im the lil black sheep thats still the disappointment.. some kids just need a slight jolt to get their attention not a severe beating..but being swatted doesnt hurt its like `whoa what happened`..and maybe hes the kid that fights when its time to go home-hence why she didnt think twice about squirming..ive been stopped twice when ive taken my niece to the park cause i carry her home shrieking/screaming bloody murder..i think the mother did what works for her..it just turned out to be a big mistake and misunderstanding..hopefully the other mother/father understands and hopefully it all turned out ok..
littlemissdqgirl 8
If I saw a woman grab my daughter and swat her I'd brake that womans arm. How do you not know your own child from someone elses? Were you not watching him? Pay attention next time. Moms like you piss me off. Watch your damn child next time and this won't happen again.
docscientist 10
kid was wearing the same exact jacket and probably looked similar from behind. don't act so righteous, because you'll do and have done something equally 'stupid' but are you really a stupid screwup? probably not.
Tandy13 0
spanking ISNT illegal, leaving lasting marks is (and im not talking a red bum for an hour) a lot of people take this too far and i blame people who ACTUALLY abuse their kids, because they probably also spank and that causes people to include it in abuse cries, tho she didnt say spank she said swat, which could mean a spank, or like ive often had as a kid a light hit to the butt meant as a warning, didnt hurt, but i always KNEW better after that.
stitch_book 4
Edit: sorry, replied to the wrong post. please disregard. >.>
lostfaithinpppl 19
YDI OP. If I was that child's mother I'd make sure you do not leave that playground without broken bones.
l0lkitteh 0
Looks like someone _was_ spanked as a child, and knows only that way of dealing with problems: Hit 'em up.
Kukua 5
Oh please!! You see someone "swat" your child and you decide they need some bones broken? Overreact much??
lostfaithinpppl 19
You might be OK with some random stranger grabbing and hitting your child for unknown to you reason. I am not. No random bitch touches my child and if she does she will choke on consequences. Plain and simple.
jakeisawake 3
Chyeah, broken bones AND their face shoved in the sand. :P
duhh10 0
Broken bones, face in the sand, AND the cops on their way.
jakeisawake 3
The cops better have their tasers; otherwise mama beatdown is going nowhere!
DA14573 6
lol a swat on the butt in a VERY believable case of mistaken identity , resulting in broken bones and face in the dirt, will def draw cops alright, to arrest the other mother for assault and battery.
riku3220 2
Oh please, it's not like she punched the kid in the face. It was a genuine mistake and it was only a smack. Threatening to break someone's bones and calling the cops over a little mistake like that is very much overreacting.
docscientist 10
lol, punch the mom and break her bones and it's you whose getting arrested.
SarcasticAvenger 9
Seriously, name calling? Are that much of a child? Christ, grow up. Or did your mommy believe in timeouts when you were a kid. My parents did not believe in that crap. Kids that did are what's wrong with the world these days. Oh wait, you are from Australia, damn, too bad a Dingo did not take you away as a baby. As for OP, I would have spanked my kid as well. I heard a 5 year old call him mom a bitch at Target last night, if THAT was my kid, he would have had more then a sore butt from getting spanked, that's for damn sure.
SarcasticAvenger 9
And if someone else spanked MY kid, then I would be on them like UFC!
FirstBornUnicorn 0
Bitch.
Ryonix 0
ydi for hitting someone elses kid