Health: Today, I took a nap on the couch in the family room. My brother...

By ouch - 03/01/2011 00:36 - United States

Today, I took a nap on the couch in the family room. My brother thought it would be hilarious to take clear packaging tape and put it on my chapped lips. Then rip it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 627

You deserved it 2 982

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Same thing different taste

By finalfantasy - 21/06/2018 17:30 - United States - Aurora

Today, my brother thought it would be absolutely hilarious to replace my cold sore cream with superglue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 844

You deserved it 265

By argfarblewarblearble - 07/08/2015 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 889

You deserved it 2 328

By ow - 17/01/2010 05:25 - United States

Today, I learned that when you put duct tape over your mouth because you are bored, it really hurts taking it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 249

You deserved it 69 773

By Ep1cF4ce - 26/07/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My older brother and his friends lit my slippers on fire. While I was wearing them. They even took a video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 084

You deserved it 3 419

Revenge

By Natasha - 20/02/2021 21:30

Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 077

You deserved it 116

By luckycharmed - 17/06/2014 17:34 - United States

Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 760

You deserved it 4 389

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 04:01 - Canada - Brampton

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 315

You deserved it 2 584

Cool nickname

By nearsighted-ut - 26/09/2019 02:00

Today, I was watching TV when my older brother thought it would be funny to rip a bare-assed fart in my face before a shower. I looked up, only to see a brown blob on my glasses. My nickname is now "Shitfaced." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 925

You deserved it 126

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 430

You deserved it 28 100

By girl on fire - 03/09/2015 00:32

Today, my idiot kid brother set my shirt on fire with a magnifying glass while I was taking a nap outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 413

You deserved it 2 721

EvenHopeHides 0

Monday 3 January 2011 9:35

you should take clear packaging tape on his pubes, then rip it off

tygerarmy 35

Monday 3 January 2011 9:23

Besides the initial pain are you ok? Just get your brother back. He's gotta sleep sometime.

Comments

hAGoN_fml 0

Monday 3 January 2011 13:08

ow?

MetallicA7X86 0

Monday 3 January 2011 13:15

Look on the bright side, at least he didn't plastic wrap you to the couch

tblaank 0

Monday 3 January 2011 18:28

Ohh my god that just sounds soooooo painful !! You must be a heavy sleeper to not wake up when he first put the tape on your lips ! Hope you feel better !

amandathepanda 0

Monday 3 January 2011 19:25

:O One of my FMLs actually got posted! And my little brother ended up ripping off a ton of skin because they were so chapped. Like they were a bloody mess for two hours afterwards, and now they look disgusting because they are all swollen and scabby. Thank god I didn't have any major plans or anything. Still haven't thought of the perfect way to get revenge on him though.