Poopoo peepee and Gross: Cool nickname

Cool nickname

By nearsighted-ut - 26/09/2019 02:00

Today, I was watching TV when my older brother thought it would be funny to rip a bare-assed fart in my face before a shower. I looked up, only to see a brown blob on my glasses. My nickname is now "Shitfaced." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 915

You deserved it 124

Poopoo peepee Gross

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Shared towel

By shitface - 06/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Arlington

Today, after I took a shower, I was wiping my face with the towel I share with my sister. It smelled peculiar, so I took my face away and looked at it. Turns out, I was wiping my face on a huge shit stain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 047

You deserved it 1 226

By aaaaaaaaasssssssssssssss - 26/08/2015 13:55 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was washing my face like I normally do. My mom walked by as I was wiping my face and said "That's the washcloth I use to wipe my ass!" My dad and brothers are now only addressing me as "Assface." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 981

You deserved it 2 511

By Rachal - 30/01/2012 01:27 - United States

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 768

You deserved it 10 911

By Malakai - 02/02/2011 05:57 - United States

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 838

You deserved it 8 469

Unpleasant

By Anonymous - 13/05/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, my brother tried to sit on my head and fart, except he followed through. It didn’t make it past his trousers but for a few brief seconds before he ran to the bathroom I could smell it and feel how warm it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 843

You deserved it 94

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 422

You deserved it 28 091

By Picky - 06/07/2017 14:58

Today, I woke up to my younger brother picking his nose with my fingers. His explanation? "You were sleeping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 055

You deserved it 368

By vegantreegirl - 04/02/2019 20:00

Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 475

You deserved it 321

By argfarblewarblearble - 07/08/2015 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 885

You deserved it 2 323

By whymyroomthough - 06/08/2014 22:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 186

You deserved it 3 219

mcsmee 7

Thursday 26 September 2019 4:12

Bet you're glad you were wearing glasses.

Tiffani Carter 6

Thursday 26 September 2019 2:16

I think that’s how you get pink eye.

Comments

Tiffani Carter 6

Thursday 26 September 2019 2:16

I think that’s how you get pink eye.

ahabsfan 14

Thursday 26 September 2019 2:56

I might have gone with brown noser.

mcsmee 7

Thursday 26 September 2019 4:12

Bet you're glad you were wearing glasses.

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 26 September 2019 4:25

Better than Sharty Johnson.

DrSamba 7

Thursday 26 September 2019 6:27

Yeah, that's a shart.

Ashamed_Sister 60

Thursday 26 September 2019 7:37

Unfortunately, I've read this FML while eating breakfast.

Spoopy Flame III 8

Friday 27 September 2019 5:00

not the best idea

SimplyAStudent 11

Thursday 26 September 2019 8:56

give him a nickname in return. imagine that happens with all his farts 😂

cheesebond 29

Thursday 26 September 2019 11:47

That sounds like a shitty brother

AmbrosiaFan 18

Thursday 26 September 2019 15:47

Replace your brother's shampoo/conditioner with Nair. Call him skinhead...

Weslea Sanchez 12

Thursday 26 September 2019 18:40

I have been shitfaced, but never that kinda of shitfaced. it makes it into a whole new meaning

Keywords

Money Work Stressed out Awkward Health Mental health ADHD Poopoo peepee Gross Relatable Kids Parenting Anger issues Funerals Family Drugs Roommate Lonely Love AITA Weird Break-ups Parents Food Annoying Miscellaneous Cooking Transportation Road rage Music

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I agree, your life sucks 1 673

You deserved it 145

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I agree, your life sucks 88 435

You deserved it 14 921

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Cool nickname

Same thing different taste

Shared towel

Unpleasant

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