Today, I took a nap on the couch in the family room. My brother thought it would be hilarious to take clear packaging tape and put it on my chapped lips. Then rip it off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my brother thought it would be absolutely hilarious to replace my cold sore cream with superglue. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML
Today, I learned that when you put duct tape over your mouth because you are bored, it really hurts taking it off. FML
Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My older brother and his friends lit my slippers on fire. While I was wearing them. They even took a video. FML
Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML
Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML
Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML
Today, I was watching TV when my older brother thought it would be funny to rip a bare-assed fart in my face before a shower. I looked up, only to see a brown blob on my glasses. My nickname is now "Shitfaced." FML
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
Today, my idiot kid brother set my shirt on fire with a magnifying glass while I was taking a nap outside. FML
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Top comments
EvenHopeHides 0
you should take clear packaging tape on his pubes, then rip it off
tygerarmy 35
Besides the initial pain are you ok? Just get your brother back. He's gotta sleep sometime.
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Comments (80)
ltsmark 0
Chew a few packs of gum, then stick in his hair, then tape it tight. Thatll teach him to **** with you;D!
VaGino432 0
damn, that's brutal. ^
SteelersBaby3 0
oh my god, ouch....
xNephilim 19
Ouch. I bet that hurt. o_O FYL.
Mirorbo 27
Apparently no one ever thinks before acting anymore. If my boys even thought about doing something like that to me, they'd be sleeping outside for a week with no blanket, and we have some brutally cold nights out here!
P_to_the_AM 9
Yeah way to go, freezing them to death! you are a true problem solver!
SkateElement44 0
Drink water you wont melt
kennylou 0
Wheeeerrees the chapstick?
MassEffectNerd 0
that is YouTube material
J_Unit17 0
use chapstick.. and only fall sleep in your room preferably yours.. YDI
J_Unit17 0
preferably locked**
abc1231 2
why don't ya put a duck tape on his pubes and pull it and see if he'd like that?
5t3ff1k4h 47
Original didn't post. This is frustrating. You do mean "duct tape", right?
Arschloch04 0
The **** is duck tape?
CaityCatastrophy 0
That's what I used to say when I was little. along with cigarats and pannacakes. Nobody ever told me it was incorrect. Geez. I was a stupid kid.
CaityCatastrophy 0
*Along