Love: Today, I stepped outside the house with my wife. She looked up...

By baby, baby no - 09/11/2012 18:39 - United States - Ladys Island

Today, I stepped outside the house with my wife. She looked up at the sky and asked me in all seriousness if stars are man-made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 398

You deserved it 3 504

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

Sunshine of my life

By Anonymous - 14/04/2021 15:30 - United States - Toledo

Today, while watching a news clip about NASA's Mars helicopter, Ingenuity, my wife asked me if Mars has a sun. She was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 170

By For - 28/12/2009 14:00 - United States

Today, I asked my husband if he thought I was pretty. He replied "compared to what?" He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 651

You deserved it 6 999

By Anonymous - 21/12/2010 17:25 - United Kingdom

Today, I looked deep into my wife's eyes and told her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. Her reply was, "Clean your glasses." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 634

You deserved it 4 240

By Steve.mc - 01/05/2011 07:03 - Canada

Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 459

You deserved it 7 974

By Smart - 16/09/2011 14:42 - United States

Today, while teaching my high school class about astronomy, I showed them a picture of earth from space. One girl raised her hand, and asked me what the "white things" were. In other words, clouds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 590

You deserved it 3 124

By boringhusband - 08/05/2016 14:29 - United States - Salisbury

Today, while at dinner with my wife, she asked me what was on my mind as I stared blankly at the window. "Nothing" was interpreted as, "We are boring, and can't stand each other." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 712

You deserved it 1 508

By Badam - 30/03/2013 01:29 - France - Geaune

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She didn't say no, she didn't faint, and she didn't cry. She just stared at me blankly and said, "But... why...?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 216

You deserved it 4 090

I'm not a monster, I'm a human being

By Casey - 18/03/2021 11:01

Today, on vacation my wife asked if I wanted her to take my picture. I realized it was the first time in our 10 years she had asked me that question. Moments later I realized it's the first time in my life that anyone's ever asked me that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 955

You deserved it 111

By derve - 07/11/2012 23:48 - United States

Today, as my girlfriend and I were finishing up a romantic dinner, she gazed into my eyes for a moment and said, "You know, sometimes you look like a character from Sesame Street." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 219

You deserved it 2 174

By Anonymous - 21/12/2012 04:05 - United States - Springfield

Today, in the "end-of-the-world" spirit, I asked my boyfriend to marry me. His response was, "It's really windy out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 019

You deserved it 29 304

Pleonasm 35

Friday 9 November 2012 23:35

Well, the Death Star is.

Welshite 39

Friday 9 November 2012 23:34

Why yes, yes they are.

Comments

mccrightp 29

Saturday 10 November 2012 20:04

Lol. People's ignorance/stupidity never ceases to amaze me. I hope she's amazing in the sack and/or beatiful!

DaisyPink 6

Sunday 11 November 2012 0:28

That's what you get for marrying for looks over substance. You deserve it.

purpleteeth2334 0

Sunday 11 November 2012 5:08

You're the one that married her.

jayhawkchik 4

Sunday 11 November 2012 20:41

DAYUM!.. I hope she's HOT, cuz she as HELL ain't smart!

sporty_14 5

Monday 12 November 2012 1:36

congratulations

twincityraider 4

Monday 12 November 2012 5:08

You picked a winner didn't you...

jadamsclassic 5

Wednesday 14 November 2012 18:54

it's because they're big balls of gas, right?

yuyqe 4

Sunday 25 November 2012 23:32

Watched too much Darker than Black. Hell's Gate hasn't opened yet...

yusaku02 20

Tuesday 27 November 2012 12:38

I wish I could vote this comment up about 50 more times.

Bquillero16 18

Wednesday 19 December 2012 7:34

I hope you got the solar system app after this

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The Top

Today, and every time I try to talk to my mother about being a lesbian, she just says in the most condescending way, "Oh no you're not sweetie, it’s just a phase." The "phase" has lasted 17 years, including marrying my wife and adopting twin sons, but sure, it’s “just a phase.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 731

You deserved it 229

Today, I thought maybe I should go to my doctor because my hips crack every time I take a step. But she's also my recently ex-boyfriend's mom, so I have to choose between being in constant pain or having my doctor poke at my hips while asking me why I'm no longer dating her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 965

You deserved it 6 336

The Top

Today, my parents bought me a wine glass with "Who needs a man?" painted all over it. Cute, until after dinner my mom looked me in the eyes and asked with complete sincerity, "Kara, are you gay?" My parents tried to get me to come out. I'm straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 828

You deserved it 3 634

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. In Walmart. Over the loudspeaker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 906

You deserved it 185

Today, I was feeling down because I always think that I'm overweight. My boyfriend tried to prove me wrong by lifting me up. I threw his back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 827

You deserved it 9 932

Today, I was accused of shooting up drugs at work. I was only feeding a baby bird that was tucked into my arm using a medicine syringe. I've been smuggling it to work because it has to eat every 2 hours or it will starve. Now everyone there thinks I'm a hardcore dope fiend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 593

You deserved it 8 793

Today, my neighbor's dog came to visit and I tried to bring him back home like I usually do. Only this time, when I grabbed the dog's collar, they zapped him! And it zapped me! My teeth still hurt! FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 108

Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 679

You deserved it 2 068

Same thing different taste

Sunshine of my life

I'm not a monster, I'm a human being

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