By MySummerinEurope - 25/05/2012 22:59 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, I started my third day of a student exchange program in Belgium. My room-mate is a guy, our beds are in the same room, and he's always in and out of the bathroom. Consequently, I don't have nearly enough privacy to choke the cock, if you know what I mean. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 555
You deserved it 29 795

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Top comments

Do it in the shower! There's something wrong if your roommate comes in while you're in there...

all4pooh 4

I do. I do know what you mean..


Sorry op tht sucks

Do it in the shower! There's something wrong if your roommate comes in while you're in there...

...and joins you. No way to get to know your roommate better then by jacking off together.

Circle jerk. I've heard those are really popular. Never done it before. Always thought its be weird personally.

Semen isn't water soluble. My friend had a roommate who kept doing that in the shower or into the toilet and it kept clogging the drain and the toilet. Made for a few really awkward conversations....

pavlovaaLOVE 7

55- lol wth that's nasty!!!

reddudeover 2

55 - O.o That's a butt load of cum. I don't see how cum could clog anything if solid wast couldn't.

Solid waste breaks up in water. The combination of hair and semen clogs, particularly in filters. I hate that I know all of that but a lot of colleges have issues like this and send notices to their students about clogging and subsequent damage.

bluekid7 5

Seems like OP needs to erect some bathroom rules with his roommate

Are you sure 55? I've never heard of that before. I could understand clogging a shower. You know the hair and stuff mixing. But like in the toilet? How would it clog that? There shouldn't be people washing their hair in their.

The himan body doesnt produce enough sperm to clog drains ffs -_-

Take a book in or something with you. I take my iPod and usually end up playing games for ages haha

MerrikBarbarian 9

55- I think you were duped. Semen IS water soluble. It wouldn't wash out of sheets if it wasn't. Hair on the other hand isn't. I rather suspect hair clogged the drain. Excessive toilet paper use or hard water was more likely to blame for the toilet block... Well unless you had my friend for a roommate... Then it was goat bones jamming the toilet. As to why goat bones... See my icon. Rotting in water is a good method of cleaning bones when you can't keep beetles. I digress though. It's complete urban legend and has been fully debunked that semen clogs drains.

MerrikBarbarian 9

No college has ever sent a notice about not masterbating in the showerbecause it clogs drains. 100% urban legend.

Yes they have actually. My school had posts in the dorm and sent a mass email to the students.

pazzi3920 1

Actually my university has a sign in the boys bathroom saying something along those lines. They clogged the drains almost two years ago in one of the dorms.

MerrikBarbarian 9

They were sent out as a joke then. Semen is 100% water soluble. Do a test if you don't believe me. Wank and save your semen. Mix it with food dye so you can clearly see it. Put it in a clear container like a jar. Run water over it. Bet you anything it breaks up and starts to dissolve in the water.

stewpididiot 11

O M G !! How gullible are you ? That had to be a gag email sent out by some hacker. Even if 50 guys nutted into the same shower drain.. Even if no one turned on the water for soon as someone did turn on the water it would all go bye bye... Simple physics

149, hair tends to clog drains on its own. With that combined with semen, it's a pretty damn good chance. Colleges, real colleges, send out emails saying not to do that fairly often, because their janitors really don't like cleaning loads out of the drain.

stewpididiot 11

a BUTTLOAD of cum ? Hmmm.. VERRRY interesting ...

Daftendirekt1 0

You're not very smart are you? Semen Is not water soluble. If left long enough on sheets, it isn't cummin- I mean coming out. On top of that, there are plenty of things that get washed off by water that aren't water soluble. If anything, water turns semen into a sticky solid rather than breaking it up...

Okay so water actually dilutes semen making it more liquified not a sticky solid also semen will liquify on it's own in a about an hour if it's say left in a specimen container. Not saying it's water soluble but water does dilute it and make it significantly less sticky

qwacktastick 8

At first I read "choke on ****"

I am a plumber. Trust me, semen clogs up shower drains.

It's definitely not water soluble, at least not quickly. Try getting it in your eyes, you cannot get that out with water!!!

148-If the dye is water soluble, the dye could be washing out while the semen stays

how can a liquid not be water soluble? the only way it could clog a drain is if it sticks to the sides and builds up blocking the path, which obviously would never happen.

destinee_95 2

Shower? Or bathroom haha if your in there then he can't go in and out anymore solves both problems

TheEpicMilkMan 13

doesn't the shower consist of the bathroom itself? :3

Well I sure hope the roommate isn't trying to hop in the shower with him...

Aww why not 26 it will be fun

destinee_95 2

Yea I guess so haha my bad:)

destinee_95 2

Why are you voting negative??

Everyone who thumbed you down meant to thumb you up because your comments are actually awesome. I am sure it is such a huge misunderstanding. We all apolgize. Say you're sorry guys. Whole crowd of people- "We're sorry destinee_95! We didn't mean to hurt your feelings!" And that wasn't just me typing this; it was a lot of people apologizing and me writing down what they said. We also hope to see many comments as fantabulous as yours was destinee_95. Have a wonderful day.

destinee_95 2

Hahahahahahahaha that was funnier than the post haha:)

60- Also, because you revealed to us your unflattering, turquoise-sheeted ass.

destinee_95 2

Wow lol ok. You don't have to look and they are just spankys so I'm not really revealing anything

zen1979 16

Awesomeness :)

Is it wrong that destinee's dp made me click thumbsdown?

PerseusTaylor 3


Not at all, 102. Man the harpoons.

Bebohacker and fuzz97 - Yes it was wrong. This isn't the place to comment on people's profile pics. Vote as you wish, but keep your comments relevant to the story or to other comments. Otherwise some asshole will come along and tell you what ******* imbeciles you are and to keep your ******* pieholes shut. You wouldn't want that, now would you?

sounds like docbasterd is into bbw

TunechiXXL 0

Why would you have a picture up like that destinee? That shit ain't cute......

destinee_95 2

I simply posted a comment. It wasn't about anything but the comment and some how it became about my picture. You guys must not have anything else to do but bring people down. I'm not taking the picture down it doesn't show anything inappropriate. This isn't a dating website so I don't really care if you find me attractive or not. Not liking my picture is not a very good reason to dislike my comment, it's not an obligation to like it or not. So if you like it thumbs up and if u truly do not like my comment(not my pic) then thumbs down it.

I'm sure proper grammar and spelling would help you get fewer negative thumbs.

destinee_95 2

What? I talk better than most people on this app. But thank you for your pointless input.

Well, I'm fairly certain talking and writing aren't the quite the same.

destinee_95 2

Talk and write* there is that better.

destinee_95 2

Also I recommend checking over your own comment before you try to correct mine.

destinee_95 2

By the way, where is my spelling or grammar incorrect?

FMLemur 4

You used "your" as opposed to "you're" which actually made the sentence make sense. Always hilarious how people seem to have immaculate spelling and grammar if they reply to whoever just slated them for poor grammar.

destinee_95 2

That's one single word I messed up on and now I have bad grammar hahaha

The most annoying this are your "hahaha's". I the middle of a sentence, without a comma or anything. It is REALLY annoying.

destinee_95 2

Good thing u don't have to talk to me haha I'm sorry I laugh to much for u lol

zuzupetalsYO 11

The MOST annoying thing is her picture

destinee_95 2

Why? Haha

I thumb you down so your comments get buried and I don't have to see those damn "haha"

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

If I lived in an area that had no access to the internet I would complain about that. It doesn't automatically mean that's all I care about... Complaining about not being able to do something =/= thats all you care about. And no, it doesn't sound like that at all.

#14-- If you're on an exchange trip in Belgium and you're complaining about lack of internet or masturbation, you're doing something wrong. It's called finding a distraction and not whining. I mean, honestly. You're surrounded by a new, foreign country, with an opportunity to meet interesting people, learn a new language (or three), see famous foreign things, and have tons of new experiences.... yet you still manage to be bothered by horniness or lack of internet? Priorities, people. I hate people like you.

Wait so being in a new place negates peoples right to be frustrated by things? To what end? Does that mean if I get mugged I should shrug it off because I'm in a new area? Oh damn, I was hoping to not have to lose money or replace all my things but hey, I should just go distract myself and not whine... You may hate people like me, but I feel sorry for people like you who must be incapable of having a gamut of different emotions. Where does it say that anyone wouldn't do all the things you suggested? Not having the internet would be a big issue for me, I do all my banking, communication with people back home and research online. Not having access to those things for what could be months would actually be considered a big problem. I'd still get out and enjoy my time as much as I could with no money or ability to complete my student placement. It's like you believe new experiences require people to stop being themselves and now just be this ball of positivity. What a load of wank.

To me, it did sound like masturbation is his only concern. Get out of the room and explore. Rub it out in bed after he falls asleep. Your life sounds pretty sweet and you'll probably not have another experience like this. Stop stressing your semen build-up and take advantage of the opportunity to expand your interests.

68- agreed, he is only thinking about wackin it. Honestly he should be more worried about tryin to find a girl to have sex with instead of a place to meet rosey palms...

I don't think its lack of internet. He had to be able to post this somehow...

This conversation went completely over 86s head. I think OP wasn't only thinking about "choking the ****" because we only hear like 300 words. He could be out all day then want to come home and release a little away from home anxiety by jerking it. Just because his few words don't sound like he is enjoying himself doesn't mean he isn't. And jerking in your bed with someone else in the room is a bad idea. Can get very loud. Not that I would know. Haha.

86- You might want to re-read everything on this comment thread..... If you still don't understand, well, I'm sorry. Really.

When you compared not having internet to not being able to **********, it implied that not having internet was more of a nuisance than a serious problem to you. It's not fair to come back later and change your position. Obviously if you had said outright that not having internet access was a serious problem for you, I would have simply explained that not being able to ********** is NOT a serious problem, so your comparison of the two is pointless. Similarly, being mugged is a serious problem, not a nuisance. How can you even compare the two? If you go to a new country, full of new and exciting experience that are just as good, if not better than masturbation, or for many people (though you have now clarified that your case is different), internet access and yet still manage to be bothered by these things rather than at the very least distracted by your new environment, you are probably either a perfectionist or very ungrateful. Also, please stop straw manning me. I never said or implied most of what you claim I did...

66 - there are internet cafes nearly everywhere now, so comparing the two is really irrelevant... There are also phones to communicate, and libraries to do research in... You seem a bit too reliant on the internet... Sure it's handy to do all the things you mentioned but you acted as if there are no other options for you.

171, Not a serious problem to you you mean. Clearly the individual has a high sex drive, just because you could be happy with no sexual outlet doesn't mean everyone else can. Yes being mugged is a serious problem, hence my comment "to what end?". This means, how far into extremes do we have to go before having the right to complain about things kicks in? You seem to think that everyone needs to tick what they say off some criteria you have of what is or isn't acceptable. The very notion of which is quite stupid. You sound a lot like another idiot who used to come on here regularly to complain about people who were able to embrace sexuality. How is someone "ungrateful" for expressing an issue that they have, just because they aren't in their home country? This simply doesn't make sense. If it is an issue for you at home, how is it no longer an issue elsewhere? And what exactly is there to be grateful for? Being accepted to study somewhere that they worked their ass off for and are no doubt paying for financially?

I would be me worried about not getting laid if I was an exchange student in any type of foreign country. I have always had a harder time getting laid at home then over seas.

all4pooh 4

I do. I do know what you mean..

runepop 0

Hahahahaha. Who's the man? YOU are! -_-

Well it was quite obvious. The phrase is choke the chicken. Choke the ****? He might as well have said MASTURBATE in bold underline italics because that cryptic clue made us think as much as a Michael Bay film.

if up didn't want to say maturbate, then why did he say ****?

Pfff c'mon downtime. We all know Michael Bay couldn't write material NEARLY as good as this without spelling things out to the audience.

27, One day his movies will have their own football type commentary where they have replays in which someone will circle the main character and explain what's going on to the audience. Cos nothing says "Damn, how stupid are you?" like football commentary. "In this scene we see Timmy on the right here *circle* looking over at his love interest Mandy shown on the left *circle*. As the scene continues we see Timmy make his move through the center line *line* and say to Mandy 'I think you're hot'. This suggests that Timmy is really into Mandy, and probably wants to get busy."

23 OP has some sort of humor. It actually gave me a good snort. Also OP* before anyone meaner then me gets to you. Don't worry, "I haz ur bak bro."

jackery 2

I think they meant choke ON the ****.

its probably been written in french/belgium and badly translated

Temi25 6

Maybe have sex with a real girl instead

FilleNoir 21

Is this really an FML?

get a hotel room and they have free lotion

ripresno 10

Aahh... Paradise =)

He probably goes in the bathroom so much because he needa HIS privacy to "choke the ****". Take advantage!!

Fuck, another comment edited. Another ass made out of me. Nothing to see here folks. Move along...

No. pretty sure he meant choke.

12/16.... Shouldn't have rushed to correct this poster. :x

Why the hell would you choke a male chicken????

dominic1221 6

"But a ****'s a male chicken!" "But a bitch is a female dog!" I thought that shit stopped being hilarious when we turned 8. -_-

I'm not 8 yet so oh we'll

I thought you were 21, Jason!

it's funny cause your probobly like 15 haha idiot..

No actually I'm 16... 21 is my football number on my jersey

118 your only one year older then me and apparently not much smarter eaither...

mischiefkel 17

Well she's definitely better at grammar than you. You should have used you're, not your. You should have used than, not then. And apparently you're just too stupid to spell 'either' correctly. Before you call someone else stupid, make sure you're not, in fact, the stupid one. Because in this case, you are.

koolkat27 13

146- oh no! he didnt use proper grammar or spelling on fml! who gives a ****? its a damn website, not a college application. take the stick out of your ass.

146 - Maybe if you weren't such a condescending douchebag, you would realize that her grammar and spelling wasn't top notch either. She also used the wrong form of your, and spelled 'probably' wrong. AND, she failed to punctuate correctly. Got a crush or something? Your favoritism is showing.

146 I never called anyone stupid. I said shes not much smarter then me which could make her a complete genius or like in this case an idiot.

grace12898 0

Oooo we have a BA Grammar Police over here bitches! Notice the have instead of got sergeant douchebag

As long as the guy at the bar thinks so.