By Anonymous - 26/05/2012 00:15 - United States

Today, my eight-year-old son thought that if he swallowed soap, his farts would smell like soap. The smell of vomit and diarrhea now permeating my house is proof of how wrong he was. FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 244
You deserved it 2 723

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Yeah but what can you do about it? He's still at the age where everything he does seems cute.

That's true... I'd be worried if she said "my 16-year-old son"....but of course that's not the case ;P

Soap has a horrible taste how did he eat that.

Whenever I got in trouble as a little kid my parents would make me eat it.... Fucking disgusting.

siickman 7

8, swallowing soap, pooping and vomiting is so cuteeee c:

I understand that's still disgusting, but what I'm trying to say is since he's at that young neive(sp?) age and thinks what he is doing can make his farts smell clean makes it cute.

28, I know what you're saying. I agree with you :D

Cleanliness is next to godliness!

15- whenever I swore i would get my mouth rinsed out with soap. I know where you're coming from.

thatKidzmOm 10

I think I'm going to explain to my 7 year old that this doesn't work and make her understand it will make her sick if she tries....just in case the thought crossed her mind. Ew!

Swallowing soap can kill someone because its ph is high... Good thing your son is only vomiting and pooping, OP.

hawkey126 0

Wait...that doesn't work?

As Ron White says, " can't fix stupid."

ArielTheMermaid 17

You raised an idiot....hopefully you have other, smarter kids

Sarah_moustache 9

Just because he ate soap, he's an idiot? He's 8!

He isn't necessarily an idiot... he just did one dumb thing. I do dumb things all the time and I'm not a.... wait... crap... but OP's son may not be an idiot still.

#3, I'd agree with you if the post was about her teenaged son. Since its not, I think we can assume that the 8 year old isn't a COMPLETE idiot, since little kids do tend to do stupid stuff every once in a while/ :)

ArielTheMermaid 17

Maybe he isn't a complete idiot, but I think an 8 year old would know better than to eat soap......

Ah ha! You would think so but atlas, you are wrong. Maybe 8 year olds in general do but this one certainly didn't.

ArielTheMermaid 17

Maybe I just don't remember what it's like to be 8. I take back my earlier comment. *brings out apology cookies*

I remember being eight and it was a hell of a lot further back than seven years ago. It's the age of exploration and imagination. OP, FYL for having to clean up after your son. Go easy on him. It's safe to say he's learned his lesson.

Hey, you can't even begin to fathom then the kind of crap kids put in their mouths prior to soap. I, personally, admit to eating play-doh, dirt, and glue as a tot, and I just had to take an IQ test as part of a memory test for my tumor; Turns out I'm certifiably a genius, so it's not all bad. It's how we learn..."Maybe I shouldn't eat mud. It's kinda gross and the rocks hurt my teeth."

Play-doh, dirt, and glue = genius. Why did I not think of this before? OMGZ i m guna eat dese n b so smartzicle.

He's not an idiot. He's 8. When I was 8, I recall eating paperclips and any change I could get my hands on because I wanted to see if I could hear them jingling inside of me. Kids do stupid things because their ability to logically think things through is still in it's infantile stage.

Wisdom comes from experience... The 8 year old will never touch another soap bar for a while. Unless he didn't learn anything from this experience...

#3 YOU are the idiot for not understanding how children think and for judging such a small child so harshly. I bet referring to a small child as an "idiot" must make you feel real big, huh? Loser. You must be one terribly unhappy soul - it must really suck to be you. IDIOT.

IKR stupid regards these days think this is normal. *sigh* you are contributing to the global fall in human intelligence. please go kill yourselves. sure I was this stupid... when I was four! at eight I was raised well enough to not be a blithering idiot

I don't know about soap but play-doh, man that stuff tastes GREAT And I'm not being sarcastic

92/94 by the sounds of your comments, you are a "blithering idiot" so stfu, ass wipe. 99 really? I always thought it was really salty lol

#50 might be a bronie...... But that's just from looking at his profile picture....

ArielTheMermaid 17

80-no, referring to a small child as an idiot does not make me feel "real big". I already apologized for my comment and I take it back. So if you could stop being rude that would be great. Thanks.

ArielTheMermaid 17

Also 80 you judged me for making one stupid comment that I regret. Little hypocritical. I am not a poor unhappy soul, and it does not suck to be me. Have a nice day

#115/#117 - the only reason you "took it back" is because people called you out on it. That's what people who insult much weaker people AKA bullies do. When people THEIR OWN SIZE call them out on it or when people give them a taste of their own bullying...they backpeddle, backpeddle, backpeddle in a truly cowardly form. And the reason I judged you for that one comment was not out of being hypocritical but to make it clear to you that it really doesn't feel good when someone is rude to you and calls you an "idiot", so if it doesn't feel good to you, how do you think the 8 year old would feel if he ever found out that you said that about him? Or how did you think his mother felt if/when she read it? If nobody had called you out on calling an 8 year old an "idiot" you never would have taken it back so you are the hypocrite. Guess you can dish it out (to a helpless 8 year old) but you can't take it when someone YOUR OWN SIZE dishes it back to you huh? Don't dish it out to smaller, weaker people if you won't be able to take it when someone YOUR OWN SIZE dishes it back to you. #Bullying101

*backpedal. Argh high speed typing.

ArielTheMermaid 17

I really am sorry. Even before I read the comments I realized that it was out of context. I'm sorry for everyone I've offended. It was a stupid comment and I was brain dead anyway. Everyone says stupid stuff at 2 in the morning. I'm truly sorry. But on another note, I'm really not a bully. Get to know me before you call me that.

ArielTheMermaid 17

And it doesn't bother me, also. I know it was mean. I needed to hear it. So thank you for showing me how wrong I was. Have a nice day :)

@ArielTheMermaid I guess you're a much bigger person than I had given you credit for. I apologize for calling you a bully when I don't know you - but most people who make such comments about younger/weaker people (especially children) are bullies but I can see that you are one of the few that aren't - instead you seem like someone who was just spoke/wrote before thinking, which happens to the best of us. Hell, if only I had a penny for all the times I spoke without thinking.... Anyway, I hope you have a good day today. :)

Applejack is better than rainbow dash!!

FilleNoir 21

What kind of soap was that?!

TarieBoo 2

soap youre not suppost to eat... (all soaps)

#16 i found out there is such thing as edible soap... kinda weird... and disgusting... but it proves you wrong and makes me feel better about myself or something.

gurly98 13

Can u tell me y u give a crap about SOAP

Can u tell me y u no spell entire words? I anxiously await both answers.

TarieBoo 2

25- you make yourself feel better about prooving others wrong.? sad probably steal little kids' candy too huh?

kandi_kid69 15

Must've been bacon flavored soap.

I have a happy life and no, I do not steal little kids' candy. Proved you wrong again and twice this time. YAY! I am a happy, happy little boy.

Idonebeenhad 17


48, don't get all defensive because you got thumbed down, it happens to the best of us. Or worst of us..

It was ninja soap, I have no idea how the kid found it.

"Hmmm maybe if I eat the vomit to"

Thats the Kids train of thought

Clap, clap for the Capt. Leader of the Obvious Army.

That is gross, illogical, and altogether just completely wrong.

mhopper 13

This could be the makings of a viral YouTube video!

Does he shit bubbles?

Or, fart a stream of them. Depending on his air supply.

I thought most kids started out trying to trap their farts in bubbles or light them on fire.

GVirdi 11

Well it is a new age

I think he's wrong in more than one way... Get that boy checked out by the professionals!

Tweekz14 5

Dude, chill. All 8 year olds probably think the same thing but just don't do it. I use to think if I swallowed a seed a plant would grow inside me..

I used to think I could teleport, because I would fall asleep on the couch and wake up in my bed.

74 - I used to think the same thing! Curse you, Rugrats, and your watermelon growing inside Chuckie's stomach.

Did you really think that? :/

MissNicky_fml 0

Shut up retard hes 8! I used to eat play doh, and im perfectly fine. It amazes me how many people don't understand how a childs mind works!

liquid or bar soap?

Time to teach that kid some street smarts OP

TarieBoo 2

rub a bar of soap in your mouth and you get mouth bubbles(:

b0ngs 7

And the pleasant taste of soap in your mouth!