Embarrassing, Dogs and Animals: Today, I saw a pink, slimy thing coming out of my dog's knob....

By budbunny13 - 30/06/2011 23:08 - United States

Today, I saw a pink, slimy thing coming out of my dog's knob. I got really freaked out so I took him to the vet, only to find out that it was his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 680

You deserved it 63 991

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/12/2018 06:00 - Australia - Carlton

Today, I found the remnants of a condom in my dog’s poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 414

You deserved it 394

By what-the-what - 29/10/2017 13:00 - United States - Mount Pleasant

Today, my mother called me at work, freaking out about my dog, so I panicked. What was wrong? He had a hard-on and she'd never seen that happen before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 773

You deserved it 298

By anonymous - 17/07/2013 04:48 - United States - Katy

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 648

You deserved it 7 399

By ouchh - 11/09/2009 20:46 - United States

Today, I got out of the shower to find my cat staring up at me. Apparently my swinging penis looks like a cat toy to her, so she jumped up and clawed and tried to bite it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 930

You deserved it 7 318

By Anonymous - 21/03/2012 04:50 - Canada

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 587

You deserved it 22 036

By crap - 24/02/2014 04:01 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was walking a dog at the animal hospital where I work when it pooped out a rag-like object. I told the doctor, who told me to clean it off to see what it was. It was a rainbow-colored thong. We have to give it back to the owner when they pick their dog up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 949

You deserved it 3 233

By lovingthis - 09/01/2013 16:48 - United States - Largo

Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 189

You deserved it 5 239

By Tickdick - 24/03/2017 21:00 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I got out of the shower and noticed a tiny leaf on my penis. With legs. Squirming. I have a new nickname. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 316

You deserved it 552

Poor little guy

By anonymous - 16/09/2022 02:30 - United States - Maryville

Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw my cat in the bathtub while I was in it. I had to go to the emergency room to get my penis stitched up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 335

You deserved it 116

By laundryduty - 15/06/2019 20:14

Today, I was doing laundry at work. I work at a spay/neuter clinic and was about to throw in a load of towels when I noticed something in the washer. It looked like one of the detergent packets we use. It was a testicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 975

You deserved it 177

paigemosier 1

Friday 1 July 2011 8:36

the ****

chimp4494 0

Friday 1 July 2011 8:36

first time having a dog?

Comments

ramey_aka_stud 6

Friday 1 July 2011 14:55

holy shit...how old are you? obviously old enough to own a dog and a car but not smart enough to stay in school.

taintedtruffle 42

Monday 24 November 2014 11:34

Ah yes ... I fondly remember "Dog Dick" day in school

kinseyhtml 0

Friday 1 July 2011 14:59

really?

HumanWiki 8

Friday 1 July 2011 15:11

Anatomy Fail.... Red Rocket anyone?

SteveMagnifico 6

Friday 1 July 2011 15:19

wow op you are really stupid for that

spez8 2

Friday 1 July 2011 15:23

yep! the pink lipstick is what it's called because that is what it looks like!

musicophilia 3

Friday 1 July 2011 15:24

What a ******** - no pun intended.

ChibiGirl5 0

Friday 1 July 2011 15:34

lmfao duh that's his penis you've never seen that before?? when their turned on it comes out kinda like a horse :P

nclark95 0

Friday 1 July 2011 15:39

ur ******* stupid

hahaha99 4

Friday 1 July 2011 15:51

i bet you dont get enough to recognize a penis..

sykiro 0

Friday 1 July 2011 16:02

your so stupid.

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I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 1 426

Today, I went to the doctor to inquire about the rash I've been getting in my underarms, behind my knees and sometimes on my face. Turns out I'm allergic to sweat. I'm a varsity rugby coach, gym teacher, and I just shelled out a stack of cash to get a sauna and steam room installed in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 757

You deserved it 4 383

Same thing different taste

Poor little guy

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