By asdffhhjk - 15/05/2013 08:08 - Philippines - Makati

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks 56 089
You deserved it 9 375

Same thing different taste

Top comments


narkill 13

Well. That's very...disturbing...

Or a hidden camera setup. Expect to appear on a TV show soon.

YES, WHAT I DID MADE AN FML! Just kidding, sounds like something I would do, I do that to my girlfriend all the time, even the running away part unfortunately.

That sounds like an interesting relationship, #70.

Bend at the knees, not at the waist, OP!

I just want to ask, is OP's username the noise he made when it occurred?

v1kt4r 13

She better have, she earned it

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Are you seriously trying to make the situation seem okay? A person was assaulted. I feel so sorry for OP that someone disturbed took advantage of OP. I think OP should report it to the police even if OP didn't see his face. I pretty sure it counts as a form of sexual assault.

#19: I think you need to calm down. You also might want to purchase a sense of humor as well, but I suppose those are in short supply.

Sorry #19, I wasn't aware OP needed my support in order to call the police if this incident had bothered them so much.

I feel sorry for you if you think assault is funny.

olpally 32

#32, I feel sorry for you that you don't understand the obvious sarcasm and the joke that's clearly intended. Lol. Lighten up a little. Sheesh.

#32: I'm assuming that was directed at me. For future reference, this is a humor website where HUMOROUS (for the most part) stories are submitted. If you can't see the funny/ironic situations in published FMLs or in the comments for that matter, why are you here?

All I was trying to point out was that an assault happened. I personally can not find humor in the situation. However it is the Internet, so I shouldn't really be bother myself because you found the situation funny.

jxcala 10

The situation was pretty funny. It's not like he is scarred for life..

ThatGuyWhoTalks 10

#19 Need some humor? I have some extra.

19, what the **** will police do? Keep an eye out for a mysterious humper?

I can see miss down votes point but Miss, you have to understand this is FML, people don't post FML's looking for sympathy for the most part, if she wasn't disturbed enough to keep from posting than it was just a funny event.

#42, Calm the hell make this FML sound like it was rape. Nothing serious happened and I don't know how YOU picture this FML, but all it was was 2 seconds of a man playing a joke on someone else, who then put it on FML. Not some brutal taken to the alley rape scene.

I feel sorry for all of you. Take a joke. Quit arguing.

#19 clearly FML forums are not for you.

42- Calm your **** dude, OP was humped, not raped. As shocking and weird as it is, it wasn't assult. Nobody was hurt, nobody got anything shoved up their ass, nobody got horribly scarred for life. The only thing that happened was that OP got an interesting story to tell his grandkids, and we got a good laugh.

it was assault it was unwanted and was a form of not consented sexual contact

saraaahxx2202 3

I think it's hilarious. More people need a sense of humor.

This FML reply forum is probably gonna be so long that I can type anything down with nobody knowing what it is. Squirrels.

I'm surprised Freshpie hasn't trolled any of you yet. He is popular on the forums.

I think this FML really depends on what kind of person OP is. On an episode of Law&Order something similar happen to 9 people on an NY subway, and when they were brought to identify the man some of the women just kind of shrugged it off while others burst into tears. Since OP posted it on FML I'm sure he/she is fine, but a little annoyed.

#19, OP is a male. Also, lighten up! Joke aren't meant to be taken seriously, that's why they're called jokes.

I think everyone in this thread (specifically #19, #42, and everyone crying because "sexual assault isn't funny") needs to consider the fact that OP posted this FML voluntarily. If he was so traumatised, I doubt he'd have submitted his story to a site which is dedicated to providing humourous snippets from peoples lives. In fact, I woud go so far as to say that if he was bothered terribly by the event, whether it technically be classified as sexual assault or not, he'd talk to a friend or family member about it. Sexual assault is not funny, however I do think that before we all get on our social justice soap-boxes, we need to consider the context of the story.

Are you on crack she just got raped and all u can think of is a way of calling her a prostitute wtf u son of a b*tch

Ok 152, OP is male, you can't get something shoved up your butt if you and the other guy have pants and undies on, no one said prostitute, calm the **** down.

beddington 7

He may have, but I bet when this becomes an FML video he won't.

But did she get a good look at his shoes?

Next time bend at the knees. Pants or no pants.

Was it good for you, cuz I'm pretty sure it was good for him

I don't know if it's funnier or creepier that OP is a guy.

I don't know, if it was a girl, she would've been more butthurt

threer 30
oNisao 21
Cusefan5 6

And that's why you bend at the knees instead of the waist when you pick something up off the ground.

yeah, but you never know if they would've tried to hump op's head too.

Oh, that's a disturbing mental image.

Who knows what would have happened if she was on her knees? If you know what I mean...

groovycrazyjoe 18
jramirez16 9

It he bent at the knees he would have gotten "tea bagged" lmao

excusie excusie... Eurotrip anyone.. no.. ok ( ._.)