By Unfortunate - 08/10/2012 00:24 - United States - Bellevue

Spicy
Today, I realized that my life would make an excellent meme: Nerd girl goes to college, finally loses virginity; gets chlamydia. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 029
You deserved it 13 934

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At your age, you're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. Well don't, because if you do, you will develop chlamydia. And die.

Maybe we should slow clap.

Comments

Maybe we should slow clap.

Bad luck Brenda?

No, she wants us to make her a meme; someone get a picture of a celebrating nerdy girl surrounded by dudes clapping!

HowAreYouToday 34

The guy she screwed puts the STD in STUD. All he needed was U.

the_anti_hipster 7

No, not the clap, it was chlymidia! Oh wait, you meant--? Ah. Awkward.

^ No need to be so crabby, Just lend him some AID and give him a Clap. And..... Well, I can't think of any other std nicknames.... Fuck.

Well this is just another lesson learnt in your college life. Probably an important one too.

I suck _I_k,take it in the a_s? Here's my number,call me when you're desperate.

The "clap" is actually gonorrhea. It received its name because when men had it they had to "clap" their penises just so they could pee.

xxhollilollixx 6

Don't forget the Wiggles..! "I've got the claps and I'm giving them to you!"

I learn more here then I do in school. -_-

ttuseth 7

Here's another learning moment from here: than*

115: Truth. OP: FYL, but this isn't meme-worthy.

So you lost your virginity in a one night stand to some guy who had a sti? That's sad. Fyl but also ydi for not using a condom.

guinea14 0

126- tell me about it. And I love your picture :3

I am so incredibly surprised that I had to scroll down so far to see somebody mention that she should have used a condom.

At your age, you're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. Well don't, because if you do, you will develop chlamydia. And die.

The cat has spoken!

kut17 11

Don't have sex. Don't have sex standing up. Don't have sex in the missionary position. Just...don't have sex, okay? Now everybody take some rubbers.

I typed. I didn't speak, I assure you. And if you heard voices reading my comment to you, I suggest you get help immediately.

the_anti_hipster 7

And 4 for you Glen Coco! You go Glen Coco!

wellfuuucckme 7

BOO you whore ^^^^^

jennifer1renee 2

And none for Gretchen Weiners.

Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at you the time you got diarrhea in Barnes and Noble.

39- Thanks. Love you too.

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

HaiImJulia 3

She doesn't even go here!!?!

She asked me how to spell orange.

BrookeSnooks15 2

Oh my god Karen you can't just ask people why their white!

Wait, is butter a carb?

weeabaka 6

I love you guys.

rocketshock 8

Yeah! Take your tops off!

It's not my fault I have a heavy flow and a wide set vagina!

oscar6464 8

That is so not fetch.

That's Damien, he's almost too gay to function.

Kn0wledge123 21

We should totally just stab Caesar!

shannonpaige97 5

Boo, you whore. ;)

jacquesromualdez 12

"Tell him his hair looks sexy pushed-back."

BeforeItWasCool 12

And I want my pink shirt back! I want my pink shirt back!

"So if you're from Africa, why are you white?" "Oh my God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white!"

AphyTheBronette 15

Oh he'll no!!' I did not leave the project for this!!! -swings bat around-

BeforeItWasCool 12

It's south side actually, not projects. Ah just one more from me! Alyssa, I'm sorry I called you a gap-toothed bitch. It's not your fault you're so gap-toothed.

This entire thread. I love all the references xD

That's why her hair is so big, it's full of secrets!

Wanna do something fun? Wanna go to Taco Bell?

imavelociraptor 6

You kids need anything? Snacks? A condom?

StephLovesYouuxo 1

The plastics, Asian nerds, cool Asians, wanna be's, band geeks, sexually active band geeks, and the best people you will ever meet.

You smell like a baby prostitute!

Kypopz 9

Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about Caesar? Hm? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar. And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that's not what Rome is about. We should totally just stab Caesar!

She's so weird, she just, you know, came up to me and started talking about crack.

You can't sit with us!

I have really bad breath in the morning

Don't look at me!!

Laura, I don't hate you because you're fat, you're fat because I hate you.

It's kind of sad that I'm a guy and I know exactly what movie you guys are quoting

I have this theory that if you cut off all her hair she'd look like a British man.

I don't hate you because you're fat...you're fat because I hate you

Did you see a nipple? It only counts if you saw nipple.

Vic213 2

I don't hate you because you're fat...you're fat because I hate you

well don't, because if you do, you will get chlamydia, and die.*******************^

MalloryKnox 8

say crack again...

clumsyninja13 21

OH MY GOD I LOVE THAT MOVIE

lacespace 8

Ah fuck that's a good way to screw up your sexuality all together. You're now the girl who requires full scale STD test results before getting frisky. Which isn't actually a bad thing. Lessons learned, class dismissed?

Don't have sex. You will get pregnant. And die

At least she won't have kids easily now, she will have to pay 10,000 to get it artificaly implanted due to scarred Fallopian tubes.

Atleast you will have a funny/messed up story to tell when you are older

I would rather not get chlamydia at all and spare the story

How is that funny? "Yeah I lost my virginity then got the clap." Hilarious?

"...and you were conceived just afterwards, and thats how mommy got the clap." *kid's jaw drops to the floor*

99/ that reminds me of that part of scary movie "And son that's why you pee up instead of down."

Pretty_Pink_Lady 10

Luckily, chlamydia is very curable. Use condoms from now on, every time you have sex.

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

If anything OP is lucky that she realised that she had contracted it so that it can be treated. Sometimes chlamydia goes untreated because the symptoms aren't obvious. If it is left untreated it can cause infertility in females. Consider yourself lucky OP! Although FYL for the circumstances.

36- I've heard that condoms aren't a 100% protection against STD's, too.

They aren't 100% effective, but they are the best protection we have available (short of abstinence, of course).

36- Condoms are the ONLY birth control method to stop you from getting STDs when used. I'm pretty sure you're supposed to learn this in Sex-Ed around middle school. But as Doc said, it's not guaranteed.

Are you a complete retard or did you mom drop you on your head as a baby? Wow.

Everyone please excuse the off topic. 38- your nickname is the exact same way my last name is spelled. Are you my overseas forgotten cousin?!

36 - I'm worried that at 27 year old, you still believe condoms don't help in protecting you from contracting an STD/STI. Did you skip all your health classes in high school, per chance?

My school doesn't have Sex-Ed in our curriculum. Thus the reason we have a 14 year old pregnant freshman. I'm so proud of my school.

72- my name is a slight variation from my real name (torbet.) So, unfortunately no. But that would be awesome finding out something like that this way!

Makes you wonder if she used a condom. This FML is missing that part. Did miss nerdy girl go and lose her virginity having unprotected sex? Cause at that point, I would have to make a hard decision on YDI or not..

98 - Ahh well even schools with it end up with that. We didn't have sex-Ed until our Sophomore year, so 15/16, had like 4 pregnant Freshman when I was a Senior, was absolutely appalled. We also had girls get pregnant after taking the course sooo, some people just can't be helped.

Are you stupid?

36- Learn some more, then comment.

lacespace 8

Condoms are a pretty neat invention I would invest in as well, for futures sake op.

I saved 15% on my child support payments by switching to condoms!

Who doesn't want 15% more cash?!?! Oh right, that stubborn baby over there... -___-

At least it isn't Gone.. Gonorrhea. Yea it was a bad joke and I should feel bad.

Airman1988 9

Don't be a fool wrap his tool

the_anti_hipster 7

If you're going to get silly, wrap your willy. Cuz Chlymidia is out there...and it burns. So I've heard.

No glove no love

Kn0wledge123 21

Only you can prevent genital warts.

hmm so you've heard eh ;)

Congratulations on finally getting screwed! Twice.

Zoh_Aubrey 8

At the same damn time.

I was in such a bad mood and now I'm not so thank you for making me happy by sharing your misfortune :)

That's pretty horrible to say. Jeez. Poor girl.