Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML
Today, and as for the rest of my life, I will always have a husband whose breath stinks. FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
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Top comments
saIty 17
Just before he tries to get smoochy, pop 10 mints in your mouth. Then as you engage contact spit them all in his mouth.
perdix 31
Get a job at the local wastewater treatment plant so you can be around the smell of raw sewage all day. You'll get accustomed to it and your boyfriend's mouth will just taste like work. Or get a new boyfriend.
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Comments (195)
stro88 6
Stop being cheAp and buy this bastard a tooth brush and mouth wash. Your fault.
morgan020 0
Sometimes that's easier said than done. My husband has awful breath and as much as I have begged him to brush his teeth better and go to the dentist and get it checked out he refuses. The worst part now is that I'm pregnant and everytime he leans in for a kiss I throw up. :/ and he still doesn't believe there is a problem and that it's all just in my head.
False_Stupidity 42
Does it smell like Satan's ass gas? ... Seriously though, you need to tell him and that needs to be checked.
taterstahr 0
He needs to get that checked out...gum and tooth disease can shorten your life...no joke.
PhilMcHawk 7
My girlfriend came right out and told me I had bad breath, and now I brush more often. Problem solved! It's quite literally as simple as that.
Bebbo_fml 21
If you're repulsed by him, dump him.
hoonyer 17
Heres what you do, put a swig of listerine in your mouth, and when he starts kissing you just dump it into his mouth, problem solved :D
kitkat98_fml 0
You're going to have to tell him soon. that's really gross and I'm sure that it isn't pleasant for you. Yeah, he might be a little hurt but this is a one time thing.
annie_rc 0
Ewww sewer breath is a deal breaker!
surfingirl 0
my ex boyfriend would kiss me and after saliva would be all over my mouth