Work: Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been...

By fuck my eyeballs - 01/12/2013 23:07 - United States - Rancho Palos Verdes

Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 096

You deserved it 22 270

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Same thing different taste

By fat and broke - 28/06/2015 07:17 - United States - Federal Way

Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 877

You deserved it 4 612

By Anonymous - 10/10/2015 04:50 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 711

You deserved it 1 847

By Anonymous - 25/04/2009 13:51 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I started fixing my hair and unbuttoning a couple of buttons on my shirt, hoping the policeman would let me off with a warning. When he got to the car, he rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. I saw him walk back to the cop car gagging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 412

You deserved it 85 227

By Sarah-D - 29/07/2016 05:31

Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 254

You deserved it 2 253

By embarrassedmom - 31/08/2013 23:48 - United States

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 326

You deserved it 4 234

Officer McGiggles

By ACAB - 16/09/2019 20:00 - Australia

Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 232

Overreach

By VroomVroom - 04/03/2009 15:50 - United States

Today, at a red light, an old lady crossing the street fell right in front of my car. I got out of my car to help her. The light turned green and I was still helping the woman to her feet. An officer came by and ticketed me for "impeding the flow of traffic." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 089

You deserved it 3 505

By Anonymous - 29/06/2016 02:17 - United States - High Springs

Today, while working as a highway patrol officer, I pulled over my girlfriend for speeding and was required by law to ticket her. Another officer was with me, so I couldn't not ticket her without being reported. We share a joint account, so I basically ticketed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 415

You deserved it 2 754

By shook - 06/09/2017 14:00 - United States - Clermont

Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 077

You deserved it 11 919

By TheIrony - 19/07/2016 21:50 - United States

Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 169

You deserved it 3 536

Welshite 39

Monday 2 December 2013 2:24

Did she still get out of the ticket? I think we are all wondering that.

sunny013 8

Monday 2 December 2013 2:24

Be careful what you wish for OP. You just might get it…

Comments

neverfamous 13

Monday 2 December 2013 17:18

I hate cops.

sugoine 12

Monday 2 December 2013 19:02

You got your wish-karma is a bitch and YDI, asshat pig!

3ateef 11

Monday 2 December 2013 21:58

1312

Xotoolyxo 16

Monday 2 December 2013 22:48

I bet after reading this? Someone's going to try and pull something like that just to get arrested

awilliams44 9

Tuesday 3 December 2013 0:52

Woooow that is just.. Great

ViviMage 38

Tuesday 3 December 2013 1:46

She needs tickets alright, but to Titsburg!

MissssUnderstood 13

Tuesday 3 December 2013 2:31

Ydi for being a nasty perv

beefstew27 2

Tuesday 3 December 2013 5:18

pig

elusiveshame 22

Tuesday 3 December 2013 16:58

You are what's wrong with the police force. Way to make them look worse than they really are.

figures101 5

Wednesday 4 December 2013 1:20

Hahahahahahahaha karma is a slightly senile bitch

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Today, the best restaurant in our neighbourhood is owned by a husband and wife who scream at each other constantly. Everyone thinks it’s funny, so they have a lot of loyal customers. I took a date there but the screaming gave her flashbacks to her own parents, so she hyperventilated and fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 711

You deserved it 268

Today, I was supposed to be working from home. Instead, I ended up taking the kids out to the park for the morning, because my wife “couldn’t even” today. When we got home, she had demolished two bottles of wine, and was masturbating to a home improvement show. FML

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 778

You deserved it 456

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I agree, your life sucks 41 572

You deserved it 7 837

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I agree, your life sucks 46 442

You deserved it 3 133

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 855

You deserved it 45 253

Today, I got a rose from my boyfriend. The card read, "It's over." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 566

You deserved it 2 709

Today, I went in to see my piercer. He took one look at my piercing I got a few months ago and laughed saying "What a shit job, I'm sorry but that's pretty crappy because it's not even straight!" I then had to awkwardly explain it was indeed him who had pierced me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 868

You deserved it 4 112

Same thing different taste

Officer McGiggles

Overreach

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