Today, my girlfriend's favourite thing to do when upset is lie next to me and play with my balls. She says it’s a comfort thing, like my sack is her emotional support toy. It’s a total pain, when she’s upset it’s lie down and balls out, but she never touches my penis, despite it making me horny. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I get more pleasure out of scratching my balls than I do out of any sexual activity with my girlfriend. FML
Today, I was undressing for my girlfriend. I thought I was being all smooth and sexy, until I went to sit on the side of the bed and beckon her over. Instead, I sat heavily on my balls, screamed, then fell off the bed sobbing like a girl. FML
Today, I was snuggling in bed with my girlfriend. She was depressed, so I complimented her strong legs, saying they were "like a horse." I spent the next hour and a half trying to stop her crying. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were lying in her bed. We fooled around and were about to have sex as she suddenly began to cry without any reason. She cried for 30 minutes until I finally managed to calm her down. She said there was no reason for her crying. Then she fell asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted to my best friend that she basically just sees me as a dildo with annoying emotions. FML
Today, my girlfriend is upset with me for not wanting to sext. I can't sext with her because she adds "lol" to everything, which turns me off. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by punching me in the balls. It’s OK, I didn’t want kids anyway. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to touch my girlfriend's back with my cold hands. She thought it would be funny to crush my left testicle with her knee as I was trying to fall asleep. FML
Today, I had to sit for an hour listening to my girlfriend talk to her ex about his testicles. She laughed more during that conversation than she ever has with me. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML
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Top comments
cuz803 44
Maybe reciprocate by playing with her boobs or ass to see how she likes it?
RichardPencil 30
You're in no position to complain. She's got you by the balls... ..., literally.
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Comments (7)
cuz803 44
Maybe reciprocate by playing with her boobs or ass to see how she likes it?
suckmyclt 3
Oof I would love that way too much
RichardPencil 30
You're in no position to complain. She's got you by the balls... ..., literally.
Chazzster 29
I suspect that consciously or unconsciously this is exactly her intent - To be in control.
Brightside86 30
This comment wins the internet today.
Bogrbon 27
At least she’s not squeezing them like stress balls.
jkjorn 16
She must find it fascinating to watch them turn blue I'm guessing.
ImGladImNotU 16
Don't let her?
moogie0221 3
Maybe she misses her own
suckmyclt 3
I really do think you should ask to play with her boobs and ass .. I know if I were her I would love that. But also I would never let your hard dick not get any pleasure. Just sayin.