Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML
Today, my 16-year-old cousin told me she was "late." When I asked if she could be pregnant, she said no, because, "You can't get pregnant the first time you have sex." I ended up having to give her the sex talk. FML
Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML
Today, I found out that my daughter not only has a boyfriend, but that they're trying for a baby. She's barely 15. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, despite spending literal years educating my son about safe sex and warning him not to do something stupid like get a girl pregnant at 16, he actually surpassed my expectations. He got her pregnant at 17. Plus she gave him a nasty STD. FML
Today, not only did I find out that my 13 year-old daughter is pregnant, I found out that she did it on purpose "to prove that she’s responsible." FML
Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
glimmer980 20
I think you need to have the birds and the bees talk before she does end up pregnant
ComoEsJuan 24
The birds and the pees. Wait...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (183)
ARetardedSeal 24
if that's the case, she might believe she can catch an std by shaking hands?
ola__9213 16
Such a bright girl
Perfectly_Killer 14
Teen Mom ahead
kf4vkp 3
Why haven't you had the talk with your daughter? If she thinks that's how at 16 it is your fault as the parent for not educating her about her body properly.
8born8 18
Hhhmmm, there's one that slipped through the net.... Perhaps your daughter was confused due to the male urethra being used for both urinating and ejaculating??? .. A woman to woman chat to clarify a few things sounds like a good course of action. Good luck OP,
angiespook 18
And this is why sex ed is important.
Luluthus 41
Exactly!
Scarylizard1798 23
This generation *facepalm*
Makayla18_18 13
No offense, but your daughter is an idiot.
Luluthus 41
Or she just hasn't had decent sex-ed. If nobody who really knows what they are talking about explains reproduction, she will only have whatever stories her peers tell to rely on.
Muffinypowers 19
How is it possible to be that stupid? She really does need 'the talk'. If she's already gotten it, she needs it again.
shinikageWolf 15
"I don't know why I got pregnant, he never even pissed on me"