Today, I heard someone calling my name. It was my neighbor. Turns out they named their dogs after my mother, my sister, and me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mom struggled tried to say my name. She said my brother's name, my sister's, my dad's, my uncle's, and finally my cat's (who doesn't even have a human name) before she gave up and said, "You!" and pointed at me. FML
Today, for the third time, my boyfriend called his dog by my name. FML
Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML
Today, I was sitting in my room watching TV when I heard my mother obnoxiously yelling for the dog. Minutes later she stomped into my room, swatted me over the head, and yelled at me for not answering when she called. She actually got my name mixed up with the dog's. FML
Today, my mom called me by her favorite TV show character's name. Again. This is the eighth time this week. I'm an only child, and I'm 15. I thought she had my name down pat by now. FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Today, after leaving my mom's house, I got 4 text messages from her about how I was a terrible person for not saying goodbye to my sister when I left. The "sister" she was referring to is the family dog. FML
Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML
Today, my mom called me by the wrong name. This isn't the first time. It wouldn't be so bad, except I'm her only kid. FML
Today, my Dad told me that I was named after the dog he accidentally shot in the head as a teenager. FML
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Top comments
upyourzlolz 11
Looks like your family just got done... Doggy style.
ingernh 4
Are you a bitch?
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Comments (99)
Torva_fml 16
Yea....Fyl? Creepy neighbor I get, but there isn't much you can do about it. Just ignore him/her and move on with your life.
T552 12
Very tempted to add this into my favourites just because of the name OP used. Hilarious XD
xSorry_fml 10
I would like to hear the neighbors fml. Today, while living next to these three crazy bitches...
rubberduckie94 13
Your neighbor sounds fun!!! : )
perdix 31
He probably lays them all down and rubs their bellies until their legs kick uncontrollably, all while thinking of you, your mom and your sister. It's good to know that you're loved ;)
KelpForBrains 0
peridx the master of fml!
vivaladino 7
Ass kisser
perdix 31
Thanks, Kelp, don't let the bastards get you down -- you've got fine taste in humor. Viva, let's see you write something remotely amusing.
vivaladino 7
I wasn't dissing you man.. chill
Jovecove 13
Definitely one of the best but not the best.
kyrosk91 6
Well said.
perdix 31
Yeah, what I lack in quality I make up for in stamina.
thatKidzmOm 10
Where IS boners anyways?! Thought i'd throw this in: my autocorrect wanted to correct boners to boneless. I'm not sure he'd appreciate that. :-D
I_lost_the_game 25
DocBastard FTW
holybuckets 0
Haha I wonder why.......
s1ckpup 0
That MUT-thafucker... I well i tried...
julian24245 0
And you failed
eatsleepjb 8
My science teacher named her goat after a girl in my class and showed her a picture of the goat. FHL. But yeah that's rude of your neighbor. Btw I like your name OP
DjeePee 25
I hope your science teacher is fired, but I fear that I will be wrong.
eatsleepjb 8
She hasn't been fired yet..but she should be
Cavebone 5
creepy neighbor, but creepier mom for giving her daughters the same name.
I_lost_the_game 25
What? It obvious he has- Oh I get it, it was a failed attempt at trolling. Fail.
eatsleepjb 8
? I feel stupid saying this but what?? They don't have the same name!
Cavebone 5
do the three of u come running when he calls?