Today, I had to yet again explain to the guy I live with that just because you can't see dirt, it doesn't mean it's clean. And so letting his dog lick the plates is NOT the same thing as washing up. He won't listen to me, and he uses my plates. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I explained to my man child of a boyfriend that we don't reuse dirty dishes. We have to wash them. He doesn't think it's gross and yelled at me, throwing the pan in the sink. Oh, he also refuses to wash dishes. FML
Today, my roommate yelled at me yet again for using the dishwasher because it's "unsanitary." This is all while a mountain of her dishes were going mouldy in the sink. FML
Today, my wife bitched at me for not washing my hands before handling the dishes. The dirty dishes. That were sitting in a sink of hot soapy water. According to her, the dirt from my hands was gonna make the dirty dishes even dirtier. Huh? FML
Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML
Today, my roommate said that whoever was doing the dishes was doing it wrong. I've been doing the dishes for weeks. So much for being a clean roommate. FML
Today, I had to tell my 28-year-old roommate she needs to wash her hands after using the bathroom. She then said she’d try, as long as I try to put my dishes in the dishwasher. Those aren’t even on the same level. FML
Today, I had to try to convince my roommate that, yes, you do need to use dish soap when you hand wash dishes because of bacteria in old food. She still won't believe me, insisting that, "There's no such thing as bacteria in food." FML
Today, my boyfriend, who moved in about a month ago, decided he wanted to move back out. Why? Because I don't keep my place clean enough for him. This, coming from the same man who refuses to wash or clean anything because "that's what women are for." FML
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the one who does all the cooking in the house, doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML
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Top comments
Harpy20 24
Kick him out.
skellingtonfart 18
That's disgusting, no-one can be that stupid.
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Comments (91)
oj101 33
My dog used to finish my dinners for me when I was full, he'd lick my plates clean for me, and I'm fine. In fact, I'm in fantastic health and never had any major ilnesses. Perfect BMI, am active 4 times a week, eat well, have great skin, teeth... Life is what you make of it, not a few microbes.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
#12 : ok first of all, there is no such a thing as perfect BMI. A body builder would be considered as obese according to BMI measurements because they are so heavy. Secondly, if you don't mind using your dog's tongue instead of washing the dishes, good for you. However I hope that you have the consideration to clean your dishes if you have guests for dinner or a girlfriend (although I doubt considering your theories on basic hygiene that you'd charm the ladies).
TheChelseaSays 34
My dog does that too but we still wash them....,
oj101 33
#14 - Haha. I have a BMI of 21. I understand it isn't perfect, but I have a slightly leaner than average body. I meant to say that I'm in good shape. Secondly, I'm no pleb. I'd sometimes let the dog lick the gravy, then clean it and put it in the dishwasher. It's not like I put it back in the cupboard after the dog finished the place off. And that was 8 years ago. When I was 9 and it died just as I turned 10. He was 17 years old.
lulubelles 33
I'm failing to see the point of your comment other than to boast on your appearance. You cleaned the plates after letting your dog lick them unlike the OP's roommate, and I don't see what your 'perfect' BMI has to do with this, unless someone has claimed dog spit makes you fat?
oj101 33
#18 - You're right. My contention was that life is what you make it, and should't be spent counting every microbe. I went onto saying that I never caught any diseases (related to microbes in FML) - but I went off on a tangent about my current situation.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
#19 So… does this mean that because one does not need to be a clean freak to be in good health, you’d eat off a plate that was licked by a dog?
LennyComa 39
Yeah, no that's not right
alfred07 18
Hide your plates.
beanthemouse 13
Dont date stupid guys.
DontClickOnMe 28
It says the guy she lives with, not dating.
Semper1369 1
Throw his ass to the curb.
xx000o 27
Sounds like justifiable grounds for manslaughter, and maybe even dogslaughter.
LovesSushi 25
Maybe he is doing that because he wants you to move out?
sigurd 11
Dog licking him off probably
Imhere4fml 24
Sewer water, with mud conditioner and dump scented body wash. His dog licks him dry.
tempest704 14
Do you wash all the plates thanks to his habits? Are you sure that's not his plan? Sounds like he has you well trained so he doesn't have to do dishes.