Animals: Today, I had to yet again explain to the guy I live with that...

By Anonymous - 15/02/2013 01:08 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I had to yet again explain to the guy I live with that just because you can't see dirt, it doesn't mean it's clean. And so letting his dog lick the plates is NOT the same thing as washing up. He won't listen to me, and he uses my plates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 379

You deserved it 3 416

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This Charming Man

By Anonymous - 21/04/2021 14:00

Today, I explained to my man child of a boyfriend that we don't reuse dirty dishes. We have to wash them. He doesn't think it's gross and yelled at me, throwing the pan in the sink. Oh, he also refuses to wash dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 345

You deserved it 523

By youredisgusting - 03/10/2014 07:00 - United States - Merced

Today, my roommate yelled at me yet again for using the dishwasher because it's "unsanitary." This is all while a mountain of her dishes were going mouldy in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 048

You deserved it 2 725

Keep it clean

By germy germs - 01/07/2021 19:01 - United States

Today, my wife bitched at me for not washing my hands before handling the dishes. The dirty dishes. That were sitting in a sink of hot soapy water. According to her, the dirt from my hands was gonna make the dirty dishes even dirtier. Huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 074

You deserved it 227

By Anonymous - 04/08/2016 21:25

Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 995

You deserved it 15 564

Do it yourself, then

By Anonymous - 27/06/2021 20:00

Today, my roommate said that whoever was doing the dishes was doing it wrong. I've been doing the dishes for weeks. So much for being a clean roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 846

You deserved it 133

Gross

By seriously_CAT - 21/10/2015 02:26

Today, I had to try to convince my roommate that, yes, you do need to use dish soap when you hand wash dishes because of bacteria in old food. She still won't believe me, insisting that, "There's no such thing as bacteria in food." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 646

You deserved it 1 612

Negotiations

By Anonymous - 22/09/2020 17:01

Today, I had to tell my 28-year-old roommate she needs to wash her hands after using the bathroom. She then said she’d try, as long as I try to put my dishes in the dishwasher. Those aren’t even on the same level. FML

I agree, your life sucks 750

You deserved it 925

By ShouldBeSingleSoon - 26/03/2013 04:15 - United States - Lincoln

Today, my boyfriend, who moved in about a month ago, decided he wanted to move back out. Why? Because I don't keep my place clean enough for him. This, coming from the same man who refuses to wash or clean anything because "that's what women are for." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 253

You deserved it 10 162

By msjustine - 06/05/2011 19:27 - United States

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the one who does all the cooking in the house, doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 944

You deserved it 13 363

By Michelle - 17/10/2013 11:51 - Australia - Richmond

Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 738

You deserved it 5 618

Harpy20 24

Friday 15 February 2013 10:31

Kick him out.

skellingtonfart 18

Friday 15 February 2013 10:33

That's disgusting, no-one can be that stupid.

Comments

dodzin 9

Saturday 16 February 2013 4:08

Leave this idiot with his dog....

katykoolcat 13

Saturday 16 February 2013 8:17

Wait till he gets very ill one day. Muahahhaha

Satoaoi 13

Saturday 16 February 2013 8:46

I'm pretty sure you know what time it is.

divadro102 16

Saturday 16 February 2013 11:37

Dog tongues are cleaner than humans'. Still, that's gross. Have him take a turn next spit-shine.

SAgirl 13

Saturday 16 February 2013 19:31

Hide the plates

junkman6 22

Saturday 16 February 2013 23:24

Put your balls all over the plates and just use plastic for a while. Tell him after you've done it for a couple weeks.

chuckcloninger 12

Sunday 17 February 2013 8:02

Wow. This is a tough one. I don't think I could possibly come up with a solution to this one.

jewelz1012 11

Sunday 17 February 2013 21:08

Just throw all out his stuff when he's gone or pimp slap some sense into that loser

What1147 5

Thursday 7 March 2013 7:29

Start putting his dirty dishes in his bed.

Cysioland 8

Friday 15 March 2013 22:49

Yummy!

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The Top

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 1 709

Today, I got my yearbook. My sister and I are identical twins, and we realized only my sister had a picture in it. When we asked the head of yearbook, they said they thought it was the same girl trying to get two pictures, so they put in the prettier one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 564

You deserved it 2 470

The Top

Today, all of my roommates handed in their vacating notice unexpectedly. They are all moving to a new house together in two weeks, leaving me to be either homeless or forced to pay 4 times what I was paying in rent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 901

You deserved it 4 188

Today, my boyfriend called and told me he had cheated on me with a minor. She's claiming it was rape and is going to put him in jail. He asked me to help him pay for his attorney. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 027

You deserved it 4 015

Today, my husband decided to imitate Borat and shout "Very Nice! I Excite!" while having sex. He's also decided that it was ingenious and does it every single time, the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 611

You deserved it 5 436

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 797

You deserved it 803 800

Today, my girlfriend decided that having OCD will help her lose weight. She is now convinced that walking in and out of doorways multiple times will burn fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 068

You deserved it 2 406

Today, I woke up and realized that the "nice dream" I'd had was just about talking to people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 742

You deserved it 111