By myfamilyisodd - 15/10/2011 17:05 - United States

Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 473
You deserved it 5 233

Same thing different taste

Top comments

MerrikBarbarian 9

how does one shoot oneself in the ass? o-o

Hey, vaginas see tougher than balls. You punch a guy's balls, he'll squeal like a pig. But vaginas can take a pounding!


I didn't even know you could position a BB gun so it would shoot you in the ass?

Yeah, but hopefully OP cares enough to rub that welt and apply lotion to it.

Don't be a ******, those things don't even hurt.

Depends on the fps. And we're obviously not talking about Aerosoft here when we say "Emergency Room". Likely, it was a rifle, not one of those "******" handguns.

I see a new Christmas movie in the future.

Hey, vaginas see tougher than balls. You punch a guy's balls, he'll squeal like a pig. But vaginas can take a pounding!

Seeing the reruns for the old movie 50 times a year already makes me want to shoot my own eye out... wonder how I'd respond to a new movie with an ass instead.

hannahcorrine 0

8 i dont believe ive ever heard anyone called a ******... You dont hear girls calling people a penis... Use the less sexsist term pussy and dick... By the way hes right on kick to the balls or "penis" your bending over screaming bloody hell but a hit to our vaginas and were laughing in your face... Then we kick you again for fun ;)

Nalia18- I'm still frightened by your picture :-/

I can't tell if I'm surprised you know how it feels for boys, or if I'm just surprised you are actually a girl Nalia.

RainbowHeadache 2

Pretty sure getting cooter punched still hurts. :| though, just flicking a vagoo would do nothing. I hear flicking a pair of man jewels on the other hand is worse than flat out hitting them.

StopDropNRoll 11

Eww vaginas! =P Btw idk how This conversation went to getting shot in the ass to getting kicked in the testis/******

enonymous 8

Someone must have just watched the movie "Wanted" and curved the bullet too much.

enonymous 8

96 - You'll find out about a cooter punch in a few weeks / months I've been secretly strapping headphones on your belly and playing Bruce Lee movies for your kid.

zkeeter08 4

Ha! Cooter Punched!? Priceless!

We got a 99.99% chance the kid is fat. The other .1% is for legal stuff incase I was wrong and someone decided to sue me. Ok, bye.

Bekeliyr 10

Uhm are you the same guy I played airsoft with that one who shoots himself in the eye?

RainbowHeadache 2

Haha four weeks left. Strangely he's a pretty docile kid so far. Doesn't kick hard at all. Maybe he's saving it for the day he gets violently ejected from my vag. Is he going to Kung Fu kick his way out of my vagoo? D:

At least this makes a really interesting story for family christmas parties w/ grandma and grandpa

vergaso 0

125(fatgirllovesfml) 99.99% + .1% = 100.9% 100.9%..... what a weird benchmark number to show your certainty of the possibility of the 2 retarded options you gave

enonymous 8

135 - you should be thanking me for not putting Kung fu panda on that kid would be 30lbs and doing a kung fu kick out of there

RainbowHeadache 2

144- his dad was a ten pound twenty four inch long baby. Come at me bro. My vag will be a veritable battleground. Better than reruns of Walker Texas Ranger. :|

Adman567 9

"You'll shoot yourself in the ass, kid."

If you're being such a PC Penis anyway then what is so preferable about "dick" and "pussy"? Surely you'd find them more crude. Calling people a "Penis" or a "******" is much more effective is transferring triviality than the aforementioned.

96, when I said they could" take a pounding", I wasn't necessarily speaking of getting punched. Refer to 27's post. But yes, getting hit in the vajayjay does hurt. But it's not too bad.

RainbowHeadache 2

I was replying to 81 when I said that.

for a bb getting shot point blank at your ass not to hurt, you either have the shittiest bb gun ever or you have such a hard ass after all the times you "accidentally" dropped the soap in the shower room.

enonymous 8

146 - so many vag jokes to go with but I'll go with: What was your vag before being a battlefield? A playground? Maybe a cornfield to plow thru?

tjv3 10

how on earth did your son manage to shoot himself in the ass?

wow RainbowHeadache and enonymous you both made my day :D congrats on the baby

RainbowHeadache 2

Thank you 178: It was a utopia. lol I'm sure it'll end up looking like a post-apocalyptic world.

#38 - There is a difference between a plastic air soft bb and a C2O powered metal bb genius.

Lol 131. Very well connected with that FML

I call bullshit. A metal bb is denser, smaller, and will actually easily penetrate skin. Especially if he was close enough to shoot himself on the ass.

rawrawsum 0

Hospital for that? Unless it went through the pipe hole i dont see any other reason 0.o

Jdimp 1

now he knows what it feels like to get raped... sort of

natashax21 5

Which smart parent decided to buy him a BB gun for christmas?

fr33m3xican 0
SirObvious 1

Did you kiss it and make it all better? haha jk

Dude? Really? Are people that stupid now days? You need to grow up.

He was making a joke just like all the other people in this site do! He did nothing wrong. So shut up and lets here your stupid jokes.

MerrikBarbarian 9

how does one shoot oneself in the ass? o-o

mexicutioner123 0

He was shoving it up his ass and he got excited so it went off

Xx_Dakota_xX 1

I'm getting this vibe that he purposely shot himself in the ass for 1 of 3 reasons if possible all: 1) attention 2) pleasure 3) for the hell of it

tittymagic 0

Maybe he is a butthead... And his ass is where his face is supposed to be!

tittymagic 0

Maybe he is a butthead... And his ass is where his face is supposed to be!

tittymagic 0

Sorry about the double post, FML glitched.

There's a technique to it that takes insane amounts of skill to master

TriflingAllDay 6
alexsmokesdro91 0

Sounds like he's either too young, or too immature..

CaptainPickles72 18

Yes, immature! This is worse than when he tried shoving the pencil up his ass! O.o

You said pencil, but it's okay. I knew you meant sharpie.

KiddNYC1O 20

74- Just stfu. It was another FML reference.

Jamicianprince 1

That's dumb if him how old is he

Jamicianprince 1

I ment to say how dumb of him sorry

By the look of your grammar, you don't look very old either

slushpup9696 12

109 - Finish your sentence with a period if you're gonna correct someone's grammar.

Jamicianprince 1

Thanks why are pepole thumbing me down

Darklord53 0

I want to shoot you in the ass with a BB gun Lay down in the tall grass and laugh at what I've done :)


darklord you fail, 25 rejected fmls? u need a hug.

KiddNYC1O 20
iloveeyouuxD 9

Haha Yup. Always look at the bright side OP:) hope he gets better..

Buttsexpirate 9

Or worse, his Rod and the family stones.

K410 18

"You'll shoot your ass out kid!" XD

iloveeyouuxD 9

Doesn't sound very fun if you ask me. Just plain painful. OP- sorry about your kid lol