Today, I had to sit my 13-year-old son down and explain to him that I'd noticed that his pajamas feel a little "crispy" when I pick them up to do the laundry, and ask if he could start using tissues when having some "alone time." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was gathering laundry around the house. I forgot my son was almost 13, and grabbed the very stiff socks from under his bed with my bare hands. FML
Today, my 12-year-old son came home after a week with his father. He was still wearing the same socks and underwear I sent him out with. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 7-year-old son that it's not okay to smell others' "wieners". FML
Today, I grabbed a fresh hand towel from the drawer in the bathroom. I wiped my hands and noticed they smelled like shit. My 6-year-old had wiped poo from his finger onto the dark grey towels. I guess he sometimes helps the poo out. Good to know. FML
Today, I found all my missing underwear that I have been looking for for months, and have been replacing. They were all hidden in a pile in my 14 year-old son's bedroom, covered in crusty stuff. When confronted, his response as to why was, "Hormones…?" FML
Today, I discovered that my 20-year-old son has been using my bras for his jerk-off sessions. FML
Today, there was a laundry basket of my clothes sitting in my room. My dad asked me if they were clean or not. When I said I didn't know, he picked up a piece of my clothing, sniffed it, and said it smelled fine. That piece of clothing just so happened to be my underwear. FML
Today, a man walked through my line with a XL bottle of lotion and many boxes of tissues. As I was ringing him up, the customer broke the silence by saying, "Yeah my son won't stop using the cooking oil for his 'personal time'", finger-air-quotes and all. FML
Today, I pulled several socks from under my son's bed. I spent far too long trying to figure out why they were so stiff before I finally realized. FML
Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
greatbigc 0
Well its normal for everyone to do.. But id imagine that just but uncomfortable!
jbfan23100 0
Hmm expect to see a lot of tissues next time you walk past a bin.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (280)
julzcast 0
Ewwwwww
hahaomgrly 0
or just don't do his laundry anymore... I started doing my own when I was 10, but not because I was jerkin it. I can't though. I'm a girl. lol. make him do his own laundry so you don't have to touch it.
AllmightyJezz 4
13 and still in pyjamas???
Linkerdoodles 15
Pyjamas are the shit! Especially if they're onesies.
Raesin 21
Some self-announced girls are aware that girls can wank and have crispy PJs too right? OT: By the sounds of it, it probably is just wet dreams.
docfan91 0
Oh man that one was good XD
HowVery 1
That is definitely his FML. How embarrassing, my parents never had talk with me about that stuff and I am glad they didn't.
HannahWho 8
Some kids need the talk. Some don't.
Goalkeeper50 0
LOL well if you told him that, make sure you dont buy the no name brand tissues ;) haha
eveadamsnyc 2
Every parent has to do this.
Vicanlp 10
Why does your son not do his own laundry? He's 13, not 3. He should be doing it himself, not leaving the responsibility of not smelling like a gym bag to anyone else.
mike3775 39
Yep, once my kids get to the age where "hormones" kick in, they are responsible for their own laundry, and if I have to do it, I wear gloves while handling it. Trust me, having 8 boys and 1 girl in the house, there is a lot of "excess hormones" going on
caysters 12
Agreed. I was doing laundry as soon as I was old enough. Once I was tall enough to reach, my mom was having me help her. Then she asked if I knew what to do and had me show her. I learned that was a trick... because after that, I did it all on my own. lol. Was probably 8 or 9.
11jon96 7
You deserve it make him do his own damn clothes