Intimacy: Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it... - FML

By Username - 20/06/2011 15:57 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 668

You deserved it 4 260

Epic Easter: Chases and Chutes
From egg hunts gone wrong to unforgettable family dinners, Easter has never been so much fun! More…

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Same thing different taste

Excuse me

By Anonymous - 30/03/2015 10:30 - United States - Cincinnati

Spicy

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 291

You deserved it 3 788

Family Matters

By whyme102008 - 13/07/2011 06:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 152 055

You deserved it 8 661

Whatcha do when they come for you?

By Anonymous - 22/01/2011 20:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend called me to pick her up from jail. She'd been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 889

You deserved it 4 382

Dumbasses

By stay in there - 17/04/2020 23:00

Spicy

Today, I got a call from the local police station. Apparently, my idiot son and his equally dumb girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to have sex in the car at a park in broad daylight. They assumed no one would be there due to the quarantine. They were wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 254

You deserved it 308

Caught

By fuck - 09/11/2013 23:30 - United States - Hubert

Spicy

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 404

You deserved it 5 276

By GoldenTornado11 - 10/05/2017 14:00

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 080

You deserved it 549

Caught in 4K

By RBergman - 25/04/2015 20:05 - United States - Basin

Spicy

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 796

You deserved it 3 359

Confinement's gonna be fun

By Anonymous - 16/03/2020 23:01

Spicy

Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 814

You deserved it 2 353

By Anonymous - 15/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Bronx

Spicy

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 537

You deserved it 5 036

Pranked!

By RetroDayDreamer - 10/09/2011 15:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 429

You deserved it 28 871

Next

Top comments

greg1234567890_fml 2

Monday 20 June 2011 19:01

whose bush was it?

green_eggs_and_h 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:03

At least you know your parents still love eachother.

Comments

InnocentLies 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:06

Behind her bush is fine.

Coon123 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:09

wouldn mind seeing behind your bush ;) lol

xxsarahfxx 6

Monday 20 June 2011 19:30

^ pervert.

greatwyt 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:33

perverts are okay..... at least they not gay?

Tyler_McCalliste 0

Tuesday 21 June 2011 3:24

yea so how do I message u

Mysanitywins 10

Tuesday 21 June 2011 12:37

I didn't know FML.com was a dating site.

fmlfmlihatemysel 0

Friday 24 June 2011 17:59

so is behind ur bush

I_need_a_hero 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:06

haha! that sucks for you. sounds fun tho (; lmfao jkjk.

IGotNippleRings 4

Monday 20 June 2011 19:08

Hahahaha, gotta wonder what the cop did/thought when he first saw what was goin on.

HIwaiian 1

Monday 20 June 2011 19:51

lol ya lyk did he wait fo them to finnish

Mysanitywins 10

Tuesday 21 June 2011 13:08

So, I see you tylk liek thus? loljk

meggieh815 0

Tuesday 21 June 2011 18:13

lol ya thay r funii.

amerwin 3

Monday 20 June 2011 19:08

Sounds like she favors some good wood.

TattedUP89 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:20

ha that hot

goshpeople 4

Monday 20 June 2011 19:09

Look on the bright side. They were having sex with each other, at least.

laurabev 9

Monday 20 June 2011 19:10

Classy!

LemonStarship 5

Monday 20 June 2011 19:10

This is why I love Texas

mahomie97 7

Friday 1 July 2011 21:31

true dat!

A4zzzA4 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:11

Haha that's hilarious.

mea_iloveskiing 26

Monday 20 June 2011 19:11

at least you weren't the one who found them (:

nfc14 2

Monday 20 June 2011 19:12

Dont you wonder about all the places they didnt get caught? Probably not as its your parents but good on em, great to hear a marriage success story every now and then! :p

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The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 258

You deserved it 14 930

Today, I found an old Bible in a box of my boyfriend's stuff. I despise religion, so I threw it away. He freaked out when he found out, screaming that it was a "family heirloom". I don't care if vile, hateful trash is an heirloom or not, I'm going to get rid of it. Deal with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 2 167

The Top

Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 450

You deserved it 4 523

Today, I went to a big family dinner. At one point, my cousin ran up to me, sobbing hysterically, holding his crotch, and making a huge scene. Turns out that while taking a piss, he "accidentally" swatted his willy with an electric bug zapper. I can't believe I'm related to this little shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 493

You deserved it 3 484

Today, I mentioned to my family that I was sad about the fact that I was thirty-five years-old, single, and had no children. My father piped up from the next room, "What man in his right would want your lopsided tits, fat thighs, and fucked-up nose in their gene pool?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 467

You deserved it 250

Today, after months of celibacy due to being utterly single in this pandemic, I finally got to look a man in the eyes while being deepthroated. Oh. I wasn't gagging on his penis, no no, it was on a Covid test swab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 322

Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 201

You deserved it 13 443

Today, since my alarm didn’t go off at 7 a.m., I awoke to my mother attempting to perform Necromancy on me “as a joke.” She wore a black robe and everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 810

You deserved it 210