Transportation: Today, I got on the subway with a broken leg. A kind woman stood... - FML

25/05/2013 16:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I got on the subway with a broken leg. A kind woman stood up and offered me her seat. Before I could sit down, a guy shoved past me and took it for himself. The woman and I pointed out my cast and crutches, and asked him to give up the seat. He responded by flipping us off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 258

You deserved it 3 243

BO Central

Triage

Mother of the year

16/03/2017 18:00

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend's mom and the subject of marriage came up. She told me she hopes I'll find my prince charming very soon and leave her son alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 069

You deserved it 433

How could you forget?

By James - 31/01/2021 11:01

Today, I realised that my birthday was yesterday. I was so busy with my painting work that I completely forgot. I realised when I got messages from friends in the USA, wishing me a happy birthday. Seriously timezones? FML

I agree, your life sucks 577

You deserved it 225

14/03/2009 15:16 - United States

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 407

You deserved it 212 743

18/06/2009 00:24 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with a friend at IHOP. When I left, a middle aged man in the parking lot offered me $100 to sleep with him in the dumpsters behind the building. That is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 744

You deserved it 4 020

30/03/2018 15:00

Today, our toilet overflowed during the night. Over 50 gallons worth leaked through the floor and the ceiling to the room below. I am now covered in poop water. What a way to start the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 890

You deserved it 245

02/05/2012 02:27 - Australia

Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 604

You deserved it 32 747

TMI FML

By Anonymous - 03/08/2014 17:36 - Sweden - Kristianstad

Today, while I was waiting for the train, a woman sat next to me. Her dog jumped up between us and I started petting it. She took this to mean we were now close enough for her to tell me in detail about her experience so far going through the menopause. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 006

You deserved it 4 413

So wrong

By Anonymous - 15/06/2020 08:09

Today, my boyfriend came over to meet my family. When I told him I had an autistic brother before he came in, he immediately broke up with me because he claimed autism is another word for overprotective. I've been dating an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 770

You deserved it 201

26/01/2013 01:24 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 411

You deserved it 2 797

04/06/2016 03:49 - United States - Rockford

Today, my car broke down. The good news is I can afford to have it fixed. The bad news is paying for the fix will wipe out my savings, which I need to get certified for a non-minimum-wage job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 968

You deserved it 844

02/03/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, I went to Tiffany's to exchange a bracelet my boyfriend had given me for our year anniversary. It was the first gift that he actually spent money on me for. The sales lady then told me that the bracelet was not a real Tiffany's item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 707

You deserved it 21 203

21/03/2013 10:25 - United Kingdom - Chichester

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 829

You deserved it 6 601

20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 214

You deserved it 7 614

07/05/2013 12:48 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, it's my birthday. I worked late, so I was looking forward to spending a quiet evening with my husband. When he suggested we go grocery shopping, I got excited thinking he had organized a surprise party or something. He actually just took me grocery shopping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 107

You deserved it 9 649

24/06/2011 22:11 - United States

Today, I found out that when my room-mate agreed to babysit someone's two year old kid for money, what he really planned on doing was dumping it with me. The kid won't stop crying and screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 205

You deserved it 3 915

04/01/2015 10:27 - Australia - Doncaster

Today, my vegetarian girlfriend put some ghost pepper hot sauce on my steak to teach me a "lesson" about eating meat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 032

You deserved it 5 672

Scandalous!

By mustanggt - 04/09/2018 16:00 - United States - Utica

Today, I got marked down in a performance review for not being able to keep my relationship with a coworker a permanent secret. I think if her engagement ring hadn't given it away, eventually the baby bump would've. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 790

You deserved it 409

14/11/2013 17:21 - United States - Latrobe

Today, while refereeing a soccer game, I was accused of being racist, blind, and a fascist by spectators. The game was played by a group of third graders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 876

You deserved it 3 060

13/12/2017 06:00

Today, the gas company had to be called into work for a possible gas leak. The pipes are fine. I had White Castle for dinner last night. I'm the gas leak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 770

You deserved it 1 189

11/02/2011 03:21 - China

Today, I woke up to a repairman at my door who was simply supposed to turn my water back on in my apartment. Two hours and 5 repairmen later, all I have now is a large hole in my ceiling. Still no water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 727

You deserved it 2 356

Do ya think I'm sexy?

By wifelyduties - 17/04/2020 14:00

Today, my husband called me to our bedroom, saying he needed help with something. I found him sitting on the bed with his pants down, so I smiled and asked if he was angling for sex, which was fine with me. Nope. He needed me to pop a pimple under his ballsack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 946

You deserved it 309

02/11/2009 06:12 - United States

Today, it was my 17th birthday. I didn't want my family to spend money on a cake, so my dad made this delicious apple ring. At least, it was great until my mouth began to itch and my throat closed. I have been allergic to nuts since birth, and my dad put walnuts in my birthday cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 255

You deserved it 2 685

Plop

By TimeForACareerChange - 18/07/2012 00:54 - United States

Today, I told a patient that we needed to collect a stool sample. I left the room momentarily to retrieve what the patient would need. He apparently didn't need anything besides the counter in the exam room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 341

You deserved it 2 309

27/12/2011 07:11 - United States

Spicy

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 578

You deserved it 10 207

17/07/2015 23:04 - United States - Farmington

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 664

You deserved it 3 440

11/03/2011 14:11 - Canada

Today, I caught my finger in a sliding door. It made me pass out and give myself a concussion. My genetics would rather slam my face into the floor than deal with a pinched finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 396

You deserved it 4 992

01/11/2013 14:17 - Belgium - Brasschaat

Spicy

Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 202

You deserved it 4 275

11/11/2015 17:47 - United Kingdom

Today, a student set me on fire while I was lecturing my class about proper lab safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 261

You deserved it 2 108

17/02/2009 23:56 - United States

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 005

You deserved it 9 482

Mesmerized

By Embarrassing - 26/06/2021 13:59 - Canada

Today, I was hypnotized and talked into telling everyone truths about myself at a show my family and I went to. I don't know what I said. All I know is that my family laughs whenever I'm near them. They won't tell me what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 864

You deserved it 168

19/11/2016 06:48 - United States - Wausau

Today, while I was reading on my tablet, my dog wanted to be let outside, so I set down the tablet and let her outside. I returned to the living room to continue reading when I heard a crunch. The tablet had fallen to the floor and I'd stepped on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 733

You deserved it 2 757

05/04/2009 09:43 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend of 3 months and I were in the middle of a heavy make-out session when his cell rang. Normally, he'd ignore it. This time however he pushed me off of him and said "Shit! It's probably my girlfriend!" I thought I was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 161 596

You deserved it 16 350

13/08/2015 17:12 - Canada - Brampton

Today, my love life is so pathetic that when I got a sample of cologne in the mail, I kept sniffing it just to remind myself what a guy smells like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 782

You deserved it 3 521

25/01/2013 06:11 - Canada - Calgary

Spicy

Today, I found out the hard way that I'm severely allergic to latex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 320

You deserved it 4 728

15/02/2016 01:05 - United States - Savannah

Spicy

Today, the most action I had on Valentine's day was a homeless guy pulling his dick out at me as I walked home from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 934

You deserved it 1 907

07/07/2013 05:21 - Canada - Leduc

Spicy

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend gives out my number to guys who ask for hers. Let's just say that I'll never be able to unsee the pictures that were sent to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 301

You deserved it 5 265

31/07/2016 04:18 - United States

Today, my mom told me that I'll never get married if my cooking skills don't improve. My boyfriend agrees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 646

You deserved it 2 440

22/02/2010 19:51 - United States

Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 305

You deserved it 23 920

Judgmental people are the worst

By samantha - 09/03/2021 16:59

Today, I was called a horrible excuse for a mother just for buying formula for my baby. I just don’t produce any milk of my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 260

You deserved it 71

Creepy

By bam.93 - 14/04/2020 17:00

Today, my supervisor asked me to help him for some modifications on an Excel sheet. I helped him for some stuff, but couldn't help him completely. He said to me, " Try to learn more about Excel, I want someone to satisfy my needs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 198

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Sunday 26 May 2013 2:59

I hope you took a swing at him with your crutch... or at least let it rest on his foot.

MyMetalRomance 3

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:01

fake fall on the floor and scream in agony. cry a little and blame him for everything.

Comments

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Sunday 26 May 2013 2:59

I hope you took a swing at him with your crutch... or at least let it rest on his foot.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:19

The same thing happened to me when I broke my leg, I ended up "accidentally" "falling" into the side of the chair every 30 seconds until he gave me it.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 4:40

Yeah or stomp on his foot with your crutch. What an a-hole . Some peoples kids.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 6:05

The audacity of people... Shove that crutch into his throat.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 8:22

I guess butt holes have priority seating.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 8:59

Am I the only one that read OP's username..? o.o

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Sunday 26 May 2013 9:43

72, just saw his username! Let me rephrase. Hex him by shoving your crutches in his anus.

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Tuesday 28 May 2013 4:44

Or you could just flip him off back, but if all else fails, give him a crutch to the face.

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Wednesday 5 June 2013 13:18

You guys do realize that if op hit the guy, he (the guy) could defend himself and fight back. He would probably kick your ass too, considering he has one more working leg. People don't think things theough.

MyMetalRomance 3

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:01

fake fall on the floor and scream in agony. cry a little and blame him for everything.

Shrike 23

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:05

It's a subway, not a football match.

Blackcatluck 19

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Sunday 26 May 2013 4:25

Most likely a soccer match...

xmidnightxlonerx 12

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Sunday 26 May 2013 5:07

39, you have to realize that this is from the UK making football the correct term. Not "American football"

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Sunday 26 May 2013 6:12

#39 He didn't say American Football, now did he?

BulldogHoops 14

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Sunday 26 May 2013 7:40

Or a Miami Heat basketball game

rttr 18

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Sunday 26 May 2013 9:21

Hey! Dwayne wade only flops, like, 7 times a game

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:01

How does OP deserve this?

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:04

"YDI for being careless and breaking your leg."

Sunday 26 May 2013 3:09

#5 People don't always break their leg by being careless. You don't even know his story so don't assume it was his fault.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:13

I don't think he was being serious..

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:14

#14 He deserved it for having weak legs. YDI for not whacking him with the crutches.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 14:41

#14 he was being sarcastic

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Sunday 26 May 2013 23:14

I thought it was obvious, YDI for having legs.

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Monday 27 May 2013 10:48

Yes! "Darn you for not being legless... its your fault you have them anyways!"

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:03

Time to give him a cast and crutch of his own

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Sunday 8 June 2014 15:40

Lol

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:04

How far do you think you can shove your crutch up his ass? I think a foot would work

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Sunday 26 May 2013 8:56

Adjust the notches an go as far as it will take

ZeusBeDubsteppin 24

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Thursday 8 May 2014 20:02

i wouldnt want my foot in there... if its the good one and gets stuck, you're screwed, other foot gets stuck? ouch :p

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:04

This seems to happen a lot on subways, I've noticed.

Dracoboxer357 35

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:05

Kind woman offering up her seat; Faith in humanity 2 Asshole stealing said seat; -2 Add flipping you off; -4. Focus on the kindness, its still worth more notice. :)

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:06

You should have felt free to take a seat. Assholes like that usually have no other purpose than making makeshift crippled seating arrangements.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:06

Unfortunately this is the world we live in. Karma will get him hopefully.

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Sunday 26 May 2013 3:06

What the fuck is wrong with some people?! Also, how the hell does the OP deserve this?

Mirailecious 23

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Sunday 26 May 2013 15:08

Some people accidently click on YDI. It's happened to me a couple of times when I'm on mobile.

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Monday 27 May 2013 10:53

Didn't you know he apparently deserves it for having legs..

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Saturday 22 March 2014 9:33

This happens to me so often that I feel that the YDI and your life sucks buttons should be very far away from each other. Yes, I accidentally YDI this post:(

Nearly

Today, I just had the best sex in all my life. After that, my ex-girlfriend dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55

You deserved it 6

Today, I found out my dog of 11 years has very severe cancer. Her spleen, which has swollen to the size of a football, had a small rupture a day ago and would fatally within a week, we'll be putting her down tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 8

Spicy

Spicy

Today, for the first time I had to lie to the man I intend to marry, because I had a very intense and hot dream about Leslie Nielsen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 159

You deserved it 48

Today, my boyfriend came out as a polyamorous, and then immediately asked me if he could date another guy I thought was my friend. I’m such a pushover, I said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 162

You deserved it 505