By Cristoforo - 25/05/2013 08:19 - United States - Mamaroneck

Today, while at the movies, I had an uncomfortable amount of gas that I couldn't hold in any longer. I waited for a loud part in the movie to conceal it and took my chance. Problem was, the loud part ended abruptly. I didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 946
You deserved it 16 806

Cristoforo tells us more.

To follow up, I was watching Star Trek: Into Darkness (really great movie) and the only ones sitting next to me were my friends. We were sitting in the middle front, I could hear a few "ew's" from the rows behind me but I heard more laughs. I kept my face straight forward and tried to pretend it wasn't me lol

Top comments

Don't bring your kid to school; he'll tell all of your students!


Don't bring your kid to school; he'll tell all of your students!

bombroot 9

Commented on the wrong fml bro

Someone obviously hasn't been reading the recent FMLs. This is from a few FMLs ago.

7, it wasn't the wrong FML. It's called a reference. I guess it wasn't a good one if it takes this much explanation.

bombroot 9

To all the people saying he is commenting on the wrong FML - the joke is since the OP farts in public (i.e. the movies), he shouldn't bring his "child" to a school where the child would tell everyone. He is referencing a previous FML on this current one to tie them in together to make a joke...

Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog you learn more about it but the joke dies in the process

CharresBarkrey 15

Frogs are dead before you dissect them. No one dissects live frogs, that would be animal cruelty.

Perhaps a (previous fml) so it is more noticed as a reference? Because now that I have read said fml I think it's hilarious.

Don't forget the fact it was a full theater it will be said by more than just the kids lol

football98_fml 20

lol i dissected a frog last week in school

23Z9TZO 18

Referencing an fml is the new pun

I understood the reference! Geez, some people..

39- No, no one dissects live frogs because then it would be a "vivisection". Without the practice of vivisection, biology and medical science would possibly be decades behind where it is now. In agreement, yes, in the early days it was cruel in some ways, for example poking a live frog's nerves and organs to discover what they do. Through this though, we unravelled many of the mysteries of our own bodies. Vivisections still happens nowadays, but can be done humanely using the information they learned in the early years.

murkinstock 5

you could have went to the restroom. that's what I do.

Some movies are so good (or so fast paced) you just can't.

I don't understand this notion of farting in restrooms. Does one walk into the restroom, fart, and walk back out? I guess if I were in a restroom somewhere and someone walked in, let loose then left 5 seconds later, I'd be standing at the sink with my poker face on. Probably not a good idea to laugh or even breathe in that air.

44, I wish I could thumb you up multiple times. Bravo!

dyehardxen 19

I dare you to get up to fart while watching Star Trek: Into Darkness.

That's the movie I was watching! So good I didn't want to miss a minute!

Youre supposed to release a test fart first. George Carlin would be ashamed.

HowAreYouToday 34

Fun fact: wearing a thong helps make farts silent.

bombroot 9

Consider op being a male That would be weird and weirder

The name IS Like_A_Sir, not Like_A_Madam.

@14 - I love the freedom thongs give my ass cheeks.

#14 I feel like you might enjoy having your ass flossed

#31 Why? Are you a hermaphrodite? Do you have both parts

@46 - I might, I'm currently working on Teeth: Prison Crusade.

chowE_fml 4

You guys act like guys can't wear thongs. Male G-strings exist. Last time I checked both men and women have buttholes that need covering.

@57 - I was being serious. I actually wear my girlfriend's from time to time when I'm at home. We trade clothes a lot. It's weird, but **** it all if I can't show off my rockin' can to my couch!

Sounds like you handled it okay. Just make sure not to forget your monocle next time.

Sinamoi 18

On the bright side, maybe you'll be hired to make the explosion sounds on movie sets.

larsak 3

Smells like a smelly situation.

I honestly fail to see how your life is completely ******. It's only an embarassing moment that's all.

Ugh, it's one of those people who takes FML too seriously.