Today, I found out I was getting a divorce. My wife is leaving me for my brother, saying that now that he has money there is nothing that can stand in their way. I recently decided to send him money to help him get back on his feet. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got a call from my parents that they have decided to get a divorce. My brothers and I just shelled out $5,000 each and spent months planning their 50th Anniversary party that was supposed to be next month. FML
Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML
Today, in a moment reminiscent of Two and a Half Men, my divorce lawyer screwed me over and gave my soon-to-be-ex-wife 90% of everything. I now need to pay a new lawyer to fix what she screwed up. And yes, she was lashing out at me because my brother had sex with her then never called her back. FML
Today, I found out that the coworker I refused to leave my wife for is now happily married with someone else, while I'm now divorced. FML
Today, I found out my 35 year-old brother got divorced 18 months ago when my now ex-sister-in-law told me via Facebook messenger, and asked me to tell my parents, as both of them were too scared to do it themselves. FML
Today, I received a wedding invitation. It was from my ex-girlfriend, who left me for my brother. FML
Today, my brother and I spent almost $600 to plan and throw a divorce party for our mother. She proceeded to announce that she and our dad are staying together and that we completely jumped the gun. We deserve it, but… FML
Today, my brother's life was ripped apart. His wife has chosen to no longer be his wife and is trying to keep his dog as well. My brother has always been proud of his family and hopeful for the future. He will spring back, but this came out of left field. FML
Today, my wife said she wants a divorce. Three days ago, I added her onto the title to my house, my bank accounts, and my business. FML
Today, my wife demanded a divorce because I returned custody of my nieces and nephew to my brother, who has spent the last few years recovering from a horrible car accident. My wife wanted us to keep and adopt them. FML
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Top comments
KateeJo 0
she ain't nothing but a gold digger.
alin123 0
I'd punch my brother in the face
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Comments (115)
jamjenni2774 0
she will get what she deserves sooner or later!!
AliBear 0
wow dude I'm really sorry.
NorfolkDude 2
That's a majority of women for ya. They only care about looks and money, so when you gave your money away, she pretty much went where you put it.
Intoxicunt 6
That's a majority of douchebags for ya. They just make assumptions not really based in reality or fact to support their idiotic stereotyping to make themselves feel better about being so pathetic. So when the OP told his story, this douchebag pretty much spewed ignorant bullshit.
CRUZs_GURL1 0
yeah your a **** and not all women are like that... sorry if you don't have money and take a girl on a decent date haha!! dip crap
CheshireHalli 19
*holds up an "I ♥ Intoxicunt" sign*
Intoxicunt 6
Sweeeeeet. So, ladehs, I have $$$. JK. >_>
CheshireHalli 19
Sweet, can I spend it, Toxi? ^_~ XD
ashley1518 0
uhhh oh why didn't you say anything???
The__Redneck 7
If your brother is the type to screw your wife behind your back, then he probably needed to borrow the money because he's a low-life idiot. Write the money--and the woman--off as a bad investment, and rest content in the knowledge that he's bound to screw up again and need help (which he won't get from you). And this time, the unfaithful bitch who cheated on you will be tied to him.
loserface7 0
I would punch the brother and spit on your xwife and flip both them off.
gordongekko_fml 1
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EnjoiKev 0
You live in Arkansas don't you?
emmmilyyy 0
I predict that gold digging bitch will come crawling back once the brother runs out of money. which will probably happen in a matter of weeks
ipwnallmen 10
mutual prostitute= cheating wife. you know what to do OP