Today, I finally managed to sleep, after two days of being kept awake by the miniature floodlights my neighbors have installed to scare off burglars. Only a couple of hours into my sleep, I woke up to the sound of their car being broken into. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Foolproof plan
Today, after my windshield wipers being stolen twice in a row, I decided to hide in my car to catch the thief. I fell asleep. When I woke up, the new wipers were gone. FML
Today, I woke up to find my car broken into. After being upset for not hearing my car alarm go off I realized it had in the middle of the night. I had woken up and cursed the idiot who set off their alarm and put a pillow over my head, falling back to sleep shortly after. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML
Today, my car was broken into, on the same night I stayed up late researching how to install my new car alarm. FML
Alarmed
Today, after 5 hours of attempting to sleep, I began to finally drift off. Then, some fuckwit who'd parked his car right outside my door took 20 minutes to switch his alarm off. I have to be up in about 4 hours, after a 12-hour night shift, heading into another. FML
Make it stop
Today, I had finally gotten my dogs to quiet down and my baby to fall asleep. Not thirty seconds later, my neighbor's car alarm went off. They aren't home for the weekend, and the damn alarm has now been blaring for three hours. FML
Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML
Nice neighborhood
Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
Snooze
Today, I was so tired, I passed out at work in the middle of a call. All because my neighbor's car alarm kept going off every 3 minutes all through the morning. It was still going when I left for work. If you see a news story in a few days about a whole neighborhood beating a guy to death, that's probably us. FML
Scaredy cat
Today, I spent an hour in my car terrified to go inside because I thought my house was being burgled. I saw rapid shadows in the light of my lounge. Eventually I plucked up the courage to creep inside with a rock to find it wasn't a robber. It was my cats, fighting in front of a toppled lamp. FML
Top comments
xCrazyMexican 4
Hey op here's a tip for the lights put a sheet up over the window to block out the light. Hope you get some sleep soon.
DocBastard 40
Watt's the big deal? You don't sound very bright to me. Let me shed some light on the situation - hang some blackout shades and wear ear plugs.
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Comments (91)
aribari373 5
It's cause their car stood out cuz they could see it
bach2121 13
You deserved it, jk. Thats 100 bad luck
roninvamp 4
I would've enjoyed it, the sweet irony
ObeyStudKing 4
Get black curtains, buy some earplugs. Problem solved.
ellytoad 13
As if "nearby sounds of robberies" are one of those things that one should expect on a nightly basis? For all you know, the OP lives in a perfectly silent neighborhood, aside from that one unfortunate anomaly.
ballpython 15
I work nights and now I wear one of those stupid looking masks that block out the light. They really work and although they look idiotic I'm glad my wife got me one.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
By chance is your neighbor a black guy named Abel who kind of looks like Samuel Jackson.
eccentrix 12
I feel for you, Fire Bomb Tim, but how else are they supposed to protect their car? Everyone knows thieves are sensitive to light.
ellytoad 13
Thieves are humans, not nocturnal animals. Besides, things get stolen and broken into during the day too.
jdbaby02 5
What a made up lie
FlyingPie 17
You're damned if they do, and you're damned if they don't.
DenisTheMenace 13
Now I'm waiting for your neighbors fml. But fyl OP. I hope you can get proper rest soon