Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML
Today, my guy finally got his brother out of their house so we could try and get busy. It was going okay when he tried to put on a condom. It got soft. We messed around a little longer tried again. Then a third time. I finally just started to get dressed and he took me to work. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time in months. His apology took longer than the sex did. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was OK, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I'd had a crush on for a long time. When I asked if he was having trouble putting it in, he answered that he was fully in. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my new boyfriend, well… penetration anyway. Turns out, he has premature ejaculation, and no idea how bad at sex he is. He actually thought he did a good job by lasting 20 seconds. He was done after 4 thrusts and was somehow confused. I didn't orgasm either. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
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Top comments
Sabraynay 10
He was probably making sure the condom was on properly. Better to be safe than sorry!
leadman1989 16
In the defense of stupid men everywhere... They can be pretty slippery.
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Comments (151)
juliushater 12
Guess he saw to much and OP wont be seeing him anymore
perdix 31
If it took him two hours to put on the condom, so you could **** for an hour and a half, I'd say you got a pretty good deal. Especially, if you got to spend that first two hours shopping, cleaning or sammich-making.
cata020 3
there is a saying: never go on a date with your ''gun'' loadedthere is a saying: never go on a date with your ''gun'' loaded
jobsman99 0
You should have immediately took the condom off and sucked his **** hard again then you could put the condom on then climb on top and control the situation. he should be able to go longer.
ReynshineCutting 10
That's disgusting. Ew.
WadeWilson_fml 6
kids...
SirBedevere 0
I find condoms to be useless and just a big hassle. I prefer to wrap my gentlemen sausage in aluminum foil.
Alleged_Cranium 7
Secured with duck tape?
LetItRise 0
I prefer a hefty bag
SirBedevere 0
^^ Definitely.
Enslaved 38
What happened to hands, foreplay/post etc.... Why does it seem that so many girls have to settle? Once the guy comes, is sex over? Not all guys are like this. Some get off getting you off after they got off.
TraviousPrime 2
i agree with you, not all guys are like that. im not like that. i get pleasure out of satisfying the girl im with if he cant satisfy you, other guys can ;)
shooterbuddy 8
How do you make a woman cum ? Who cares ....
slipknotz 0
Show them that picture of the dog.
mike410 0
Your probably a virgin
Xathanos 16
The OPs name = win, giggity ;)
malvoliosf 1
Look on the bright side: in your life, you will have other, better lovers. That guy, whenever he has sex for the rest of his life, at least one person in the bed, and probably both, will have no idea what they're doing.