Today, I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection. I asked if he could take me to the doctor. He responded by saying, "Just shove some ice up there. It'll go away." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, in school my shoulder was killing me from a softball injury. I went to the nurse's office and asked "Can I have some ice?" They responded with "Why, what happened to your face?" FML
Today, I went to the doctor to see if she could check a lump in my vagina. She pushed the lump and asked, "Does this make you want to use the bathroom for a number 2?" I said yes. Turns out, it’s hard poop pushing against my intestines and the outside vagina wall. FML
Today, I've been having persistent fungal infections and was getting treated by a male gynecologist. I had to go in to give vaginal swab tests. I washed and cleaned before I left, but when I got on the doctor's table I already had so much discharge. The doctor asked, "Is it the medicine?" I had to say no. FML
Today, I came back from the doctor after having been diagnosed with a UTI. My dad now won't shut up about it, saying stuff like, "You must be 'pissed'", "Looks like 'urine' a bit of pain", and "'Urea'-lly need some antibiotics, son", all while making obnoxious finger quotes in the air. FML
Today, at my job at a frozen yogurt shop, an elderly woman gladly announced that I'd be seeing a lot of her due to the vaginal infection that she has. Thank you for that, ma'am. FML
Today, my grandmother loudly announced that she has a yeast infection. Under her breast. She attempted to show me. FML
Today, my roommate complained about his penis being smelly and itchy. It's been a week. Yesterday he woke me up in the middle of the night, asking if I had some kind of Vaseline or moisturizer he could use for the itching. He still refuses to go to the doctor. FML
Today, I witnessed my dad spreading his ass cheeks to show my mom the rashes his hemorrhoids are giving him. FML
Today, after spending the past four days asking both my husband and my father-in-law to salt our sidewalk, I slipped on the ice. I hit my head on our concrete stairs. While holding ice on my head, my father-in-law patted my head and said, "I'll go get some salt." FML
Today, my uncle called me at work, telling me to rush him to the doctor's. I get home and he doesn't"t want to go anywhere. He says he has the chills, so I turn on the furnace. Next he says he's too hot, and stripped to his underwear. I ask him to let me take him to doctor. He does nothing. Work is expecting me to bring a doctor's note tomorrow. FML
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Top comments
kaykay20 0
Guess you will be making the appointment yourself and taking a taxi?
Voldy_fml 16
Ice? Wow..Maybe ask your mom? Or a close FEMALE relative?
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Comments (138)
Kassybabz 2
HaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!
sirsnoop 3
That's freaking hilarious
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
This is why men do not have vaginas.
stevob100 0
Just rub some windex on it...
Katastrophe101 8
My daddy always says rub some dirt in it. That shit'll clear right up. ;)
spaboolly 26
To everybody saying to just go to the doctor herself, doctors are not allowed to examine or treat anyone under the age of 18 without expressed consent from the parent. Even in the emergency room. Stupid as all hell, but that's how it is. I had the exact same problem at one point. OP, if you can't convince someone to take you, try looking up your symptoms online to get ideas of what exactly it might be. I'm gonna be a little graphic here (I apologize), but you should try to tell what type of pain it is and where exactly it's located. Is it burning while you urinate? Or does it sting near your ****** after? If it's the first, it may be a UTI, which can only be treated by antibiotics prescribed by a doctor. You will have to find some way to convince a parent to take you, as this can result in a kidney infection and become very dangerous. If it feels like the infection is in the vaginal area, you might try treating it with an over the counter yeast infection medication and see if that makes it go away. It could also be a bacterial vaginal infection, which again would require antibiotics prescribed by a doctor. I'm not a medical professional, so please don't take this as a doctor's advice or anything, but I've had problems like this several times and I know how much it sucks and how hard it is to get treatment if you're underage. Try talking to your dad again, or another person (relative, friend's parents, school nurse, etc.) to see if they can help you communicate the seriousness of your problem to him more effectively.
Clamcreepy 7
????this is way to long..
Cinn_fml 23
It's not that long. Maybe you should try reading more, then one paragraph might not seem like such a big trial for you...
MissMae93 23
In regards to your statement about doctor's being unable to treat patients under the age of 18, just curious as to where you live? I know when I was younger and my parents were too busy to drive me to the doctor's, I'd hop on a bus and get there myself. I've never been turned down due to age.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
I can't say as I ever had a problem getting a doctor to treat me in the hospital or otherwise when I was underage. There may be certain things they can't do but I think you are wrong in saying that they can't treat underage patients. At least that is not true everywhere. It would be unethical for a Doctor to look at someone who is asking and obviously needs medical treatment and say "No sorry, come back with your parents".
spaboolly 26
After doing some more research, the actual laws apparently varies quite a bit by state and the medical issue you are trying to have addressed. However I believe it is the norm for most doctors and hospitals to require parental consent due to liability issues. As I said, I was speaking from personal experience, and was told (after being refused examination or treatment) that consent was required by law.
suckingatlife 9
Peter Griffin
DjeePee 25
Well, why would you tell that to your dad? Wouldn't it be less humiliating to just say that you feel terrible sick or something like that? Or to go to the doctor yourself?
Armokir 1
Sorry but if your dad was serious, he is seriously stupid...
CDeCam 9
Wow, that's cold
ImDominicanSMD 5
The dominican way...