Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I used a self-tanning towelette to help even out my tan lines and disguise my vitiligo a bit. Now my stomach is orange and my spots are even more noticeable. FML
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
Today, I'm so pale that I managed to get a sunburn while sitting in a bus. FML
Today, I was told to rub in my sunscreen because I looked like a ghost. I wasn't wearing any. I'm just that white. FML
Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML
Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML
Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML
Today, my 15 year-old brother, visiting me for the weekend, thought it would be a great idea to switch my expensive moisturiser for fake tan cream. I'm going to work in 12 hours. I'm fluorescent orange. FML
Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML
Today, it was hot out, so I wore shorts. My dad took one look at me and said, "Your thighs are so pale, it's like staring into the sun". FML
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Top comments
TheDarkoprince 0
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da Oompa, Loopma, doom-pa-dee-do
nicolexsmile 0
YDI
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Comments (207)
babykk 0
hahaha that is awesomeee!!! that just made my day.. youre an idiot :) hahaha
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Fake. Definitely. It's a classic book, but not that many children in the current generation read it, for it to be to the point where they follow you around singing. Try to resubmit saying you looked like the movie version. ;)
ikickass 0
wow another prop bout beein black i dnt need 2 worry bout tht tanin shit i feel real srry 4 u. willie wonka's chocolate factory =)
princesskitten 0
YDI for being stupid enough to use orange spray tan and for not being satisfied with the skin color God gave you.
Nacirema20 0
haha, if i were the other kids, i'd b doing the exact same thing... YDI. :)
Grrrl 0
Why does everyone insist on fake FMLs? I believe it, considering the cruel nature of some children these days and the fact that most toddlers PROBABLY know what oompah loompah's are. But really, that sucks.
monkyepum 0
Just be like "Yeah! And if you don't stop doing that I'm gonna tell Mr. Wonka to stop making chocolate for you guys! D
nikshy2329 0
people at my school does that to ppl that use fake tans, it's really funny. but, sorry. hah.
iKaite 0
*******. Epic. Lolz.
EzZy_Alpha 0
Daaamn.Though,once my mom used a faked tan spray to a family party.Me and my aunt spend the whole day calling her Mrs.Orange.