Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML
Sunscreen season is open
Today, a day after I went to the beach and fell asleep in the sun without applying sunscreen, I woke up to find myself looking like a lobster, with the worst tan lines possible. On top of that, I had to go to a wedding, and when I walked in, my cousin asked if I had “taken a bath in some tomato soup.” FML
Today, I came home from a crazy costume party and took a hot shower. When I opened my eyes and saw the water running from my head was bloody, I freaked out and called my friend for help. She had to remind me that for the party, I'd coloured my hair red with washable hair dye. FML
Cool nickname
Today, I was watching TV when my older brother thought it would be funny to rip a bare-assed fart in my face before a shower. I looked up, only to see a brown blob on my glasses. My nickname is now "Shitfaced." FML
Red flag
Today, I went to a neon-themed party. Standing by the UV light, I looked down and realised my pad was glowing through my tights. FML
Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we were inside, my mom yelled to me, "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML
Asshats
Today, I was walking in the park when I heard some boys shouting behind me. As I turned around they poured a bucket of red liquid over my head. They thought I was someone they knew. I wasn't. And I was wearing a $200 white dress. Red dye doesn't come out of white dresses. FML
Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML
Stained
Today, I went to a party wearing a cute new pale blue dress. As I was walking through the crowd, I felt something cold and wet on my back. Someone had spilled a drink on me, but instead of saying anything, whoever did it pretended nothing happened. I spent the rest of the night with a giant dark blue wet stain on my back. FML
Experimental
Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark, only to discover it was poop. After further investigation, I found out my younger sister had been wearing them and "experimenting". FML
Top comments
Natasha14641 7
You should've used the name Bloody Mary instead, OP.
misspulkadot24 17
Was it a costume party? Because, that's a pretty damn original outfit. Rock it! Get the string from a balloon to get the whole effect.
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Comments (103)
eddeeezzyy 19
Dump a very dirty white garbage bag on top of his head and say, "Now you're a used condom!"
U_GotitDude 18
At least it was just tomato juice FYL OP
DrunkButterfly 17
It was before you left, so why not just shower and change? What's the big deal? Funny brother tho! :)
LiveLoveBeatles 19
The big deal was that OP was already finished getting ready and about to head over to the party in an outfit she'd probably spent a while choosing. I sure as hell wouldn't want to go through all of that again.
DrunkButterfly 17
Yeah because changing takes such a long time? You and op sound high maintenance.
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
If I paid good money for this dress and it was specifically for this party, and my brother ruined it. Yes, I will be angry. I'm sure you would be too.
LiveLoveBeatles 19
"Dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head" sounds like there's going to be a lot more involved than just changing clothes not to mention dealing with the tomato smell
DocBastard 38
Right, that's why she said "shower and change". Not every girl takes 2 hours to get ready. Learn to read, idiots.
ManInTheMachine 19
Actually, 36, it says she "dressed in all white", not that she "wore a white dress". Doesn't change the fact that the brother is a douche, but I just wanted to make sure we were all clear on that.
hellonyancat 6
Maybe she didn't have time. Shower, dress, hair and make up all take time. I know I don't start getting ready 2 minutes before I want to leave.
Seany_93 18
Haha true, some people are sooks, takes me a sec to change a shirt, deo and bam off ya go
Catkam623 27
I'm not sure i understand that
CheshireHalli 19
Just to grow my two cents in, even if didn't take a long time to shower and change, she might not have another all white outfit to change into, which would definitely make this scenario frustrating.
WelcomeToAndale 13
Don't worry catkam, nobody really understands Australians.
I_iz_B_a_troll 23
Shouldn't've had a v8! :D
SuperDanielNL 23
Kick him in the balls and say: "now you're sterile."
perdix 29
Since he ruined your UV party, you ought to kick it up the electromagnetic spectrum and send him to a X-ray party to see which bones you crushed in the well-deserved beatdown!
grtfuldeadlovr 27
HahahahHhahahhHahhah
MrsAlexander83 10
Anyone else see her name was Mary?!?! Bloody Mary?! HA!
HowieDoIt 21
A little late on that draw cowboy...
Perfectg 9
He's funny :p FYL
DudeEvil 22
As long as it ain't you, eh?
WonkeyDonkey 10
If he was my brother I would of personally dropped him like a bag of spuds, with a knee to his groin ;)