Today, I decided to go through my husband's phone to make sure I invited everyone to the surprise party I was planning for him. There were a few I had missed so I called to let them know about it. The last number I called was his girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband left his phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being very curious, I called "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, I was reassuring my girlfriend that I wasn't cheating on her because I was sneaking around. I'm actually just planning a surprise birthday party for her. During the reassuring, I accidentally called her by another girl's name. FML
Today, my husband decided to start seeing other people. I found out when I called and interrupted his date. FML
Today I found out my husband was throwing a 50th surprise party for me, and no one RSVP'd because of my best friend starting arguing with everyone in a group text. This was going to be the first big party or surprise party that I'd ever had. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML
Today, I called back a number I'd recently missed a call from. To my surprise, it was my boyfriend's fiancée's number. I've been with him four years, he's been with her for six. Turns out, not only is he a cheating jerk, but technically I'M the other woman. FML
Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML
Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invited all his friends and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I called to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML
Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML
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Top comments
Bostonian3352 0
Well maybe now his surprise party can turn into his surprise divorce
huggles87 0
that sucks...maybe you could cancel the party, give him nothing but a card telling him to celebrate with the other bitch.
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Comments (151)
disturbed_man 0
lol when something like this happends what do you feel RAGE AND ANGER or depressed and sad "choose only one"
pinkprincess9113 0
you should totally still have the party and make him pretend that you have no idea and that you're totally clueless as to who this other woman is, and then when it comes time to open presents, he'll open his from you and wham bam van dam it'll be divorce papers.
veliki 0
that's gonna be some surprise!
01phoenix 0
Back on subject: You wanna surprise him? Max out all your credit cards and then take your name off of them. Sell all of his stuff, car and all. Take out everything in your bank accounts, investments, etc. (In other words, take the assets, leave the liabilities). Leave your gift for last, and his girlfriend's next to last. Divorce papers sound like an excellent gift...for you. FYI: if you've been married for more than 10 years, you're entitled to half of his SSI and pension.
abu3mair 0
well make it a surprise "i found out and i got all these people to beat the shit out of you " party
xXPillowXx 0
Bitch move on your part checking through his phone, and "accidentally" calling all the numbers on it... believability factor of this FML. 3/10
winterxroses 3
Bitch move for going through his phone to call all his friends over for his surprise party? Did you even read the FML?
kenjenkei 32
Might want to learn to read, buddy. I heard it's useful in the real world- unless you plan to make a living insulting people you don't know over the internet. C:
keenaz 0
Some of you are the biggest idiots and bitches ever
whatever222 3
the 1st sentence into this FML I already knew the outcome...
atishe24 9
Ouch! You should have the party anyway and announce there that you're leaving him for being a cheater!
PhishloverA 14
Don't throw him a party anymore. I hallo hope he's in the process of becoming your ex-husband