Today, I came in to work looking very tan. I took Friday off to go to a friend's funeral, which was outdoors, and I tan very easily. Now my boss and everyone else thinks I lied about my friend's death to get off work on a Friday. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boss called me a liar and untrustworthy. Why? Yesterday I went home to grieve, after finding out my father figure is in hospice, but because he's just in hospice and not actually dead yet, that somehow means I lied about his death to get a day off work. What? FML
Today, I ran into my boss when I was at the beach. He told me he was sorry for my loss. I asked him, "What loss?" Then I remembered I’d lied about taking time off under the pretense of bereavement of my grandmother passing away. FML
Today, I called off work saying my Great Grandmother died. A co-worker texted me later asking where and when the funeral was. I made up a lie and said some random funeral home and date. My co-workers sent flowers to the funeral home for condolences. The flowers were returned. FML
Today, after I let my job know I needed time off for a friend's funeral a week ahead of time and they declined to approve it, telling me to call in sick, the day of the funeral arrived and I called in sick, only to come back to a write-up and threats of being fired for not getting it approved in advance. FML
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
Today, my boss claimed that I've been lying to get days off because apparently nobody can be so unlucky as to have three family members die within a month. I'm just that unlucky, and suspended. FML
Today, I was told to rub in my sunscreen because I looked like a ghost. I wasn't wearing any. I'm just that white. FML
Today, I was bored out of my mind at work. I told my coworker he was lucky to be leaving early. I forgot the reason of his early departure was to go to his grandfather's funeral. FML
Today, my sister called me at work and told me our elderly mom had passed away. I dropped everything and rushed home, to find out she was fine, and that my sister was just pranking me. When I explained this to my boss, he accused me of lying to get out of work, and I was fired. FML
Today, I told my boss that my grandma died to get a day off work, but then my grandma showed up at the office looking for me because she wanted to go shopping. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
birdfreak 24
I'm so sorry for your loss. Your boss's a douche bag.
AmethystRain 20
You should have taken a cool "vacation" pic of yourself standing next to the casket.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (187)
djlolo1129 0
I am sorry for your loss and for having to put up with a douchey boss btw I know how hard it is to loose some one close to you
birds_fml 7
Is your boss retarded? What, you can't get a tan on Saturday or Sunday?
perdix 29
The good news is no one suspects you of murdering your friend, just so you could get the day off for tanning. That's a more heinous motive for killing than shooting a man in Reno, just to watch him die.
braaten 0
Check out my FML vid. "crazy life at 3400' hd" on YouTube!!
SnailJamsss 6
Show him your farmers tan
zcheema17 0
I'm sorry for you're loss...:/ ur boss is an ass!
mjninety 9
Where else would a funeral be?
itschrisssybro 8
Sorry for your loss op! Hope everything is okay. Your boss is an idiot.
DeLpHe3zY 7
its ok.. people always assume things
J_Shorty_17 6
So sorry for the loss of your friend, my condolences to you and the family ((hugs)). I must say though, what a crappy place you must work in if your own co-workers don't believe what you're saying. I certainly wouldn't want to work in a place where people think i abuse days off and make assumptions about things.