Today, I came home from school to find almost every single personal possession and piece of furniture from my bedroom all laid out or disassembled in the back yard. My dad smugly told me I'd better start moving it all back. This is his revenge for me salting his coffee this morning. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my father took revenge on me for bankrupting him in a game of Monopoly. His revenge consisted of having a truckload of sand dumped in my driveway while I was at work. FML
Today, it's the third day of my dad's revenge after he snapped over me supposedly using the word "duh" in every other sentence. He got his hands on my old recorder and has been playing it loudly and out of tune outside my room when I try to do my homework. My mom thinks this is hilarious. FML
Today, my dad is still mad because I tossed his empty coffee can over 3 days ago. FML
Today, after threatening my son for weeks that if he didn't clean his room, I would, I went in, equipped with a garbage bag, ready to throw away everything I found, only to discover dozens of empty bottles, two partially empty pizza boxes, Taco Bell wrappers, and cockroaches. FML
Today, I played a friendly prank on my dad, loosening the legs of his chair so it would fall apart when he sat on it. He responded by making me stand outside and watch as he keyed both sides of my car, front to back, as punishment. FML
Today, after weeks of coming home to find my furniture all tipped over, thinking the place was haunted, and accepting my boyfriend's offers to come over and "comfort" me, I came home from work early. I found my boyfriend in the kitchen, kicking over all the chairs. FML
Today, my dad came up into my room and told me that as a consequence of breaking my MacBook in anger, he’s punishing me by helping him with yardwork every single hour of the day. FML
Today, I visited my dad. He gave the, "You live under my roof, you follow my rules" lecture since I didn't do my "chores". I moved out 3 years ago. FML
Today, I came home to find that my mother had cleaned my room, and she'd done a very good job, too. So good in fact, that she even managed to remove all of the furniture, replacing it with a note that said, "It's time to go, sweetie XO". FML
Today, my dad had a day off and was 'bored' so he decided to move our entire kitchen into our living room. We now have no running water, no oven that works and the entire house is a bombsite. He has an entire week off. FML
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Top comments
poemqueen 15
You shouldn't have salted his coffee then!
RensM 22
1st off Coffee is Holy you never mess with it so you definitely deserved it/ 2nd I like your dad's creativity, you got to respect the effort he put into that one
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Comments (158)
raphanne_fml 33
I'm wondering what he did to you that you salted his coffee... But well, don't break the prank chain!
illmatic2 16
You're lucky he didn't assalt you for salting his coffee.
BellaBelle_fml 23
I see what you did there...and I didn't like it.
rkmepm 16
Da dah dah dah da da da da dap salt peanuts salt peanuts ^^
Azlein 0
My dad a-salt-ed me, he took packets of salt from work and threw them at me while I was making sandwiches....
sabor_ranchero 12
At least it wasn't in the front yard with a huge "Garage Sale" sign next to your belongings.
IntoTheClouds 42
That would've been funnier.
ea49610 0
Im 15 relaaax it was just a mistake
BellaBelle_fml 23
That was a response to #6 under his comment above.
ayannamoja 0
Brilliant!
deviable 9
Obviously doing that would give him a salty attitude.
iloveshim 14
Good word play u sly dog you:).
crownlogic 25
I'm wondering why you salted his coffee in the first place. Is this an ongoing thing between you two?
melonrind 8
Your prank < Your Dad's prank
yamatelle 19
You should have bean grounded for brewing for such a heated argument.
TipsyHobo 7
Lmao, of all the things to spell wrong. "I'm a hobo, and I approve this message."
every1luvsboners 11
Just light it all on fire, he's the one that'll have to buy you new shit.
moonballsFTW 0
Our he could tell her to get a job and buy her own shit. If you have no respect for your stuff then you don't deserve it. Period.