Miscellaneous: Today, I called the toaster a "cheeky thing" for being done before...

By jenni6488 - 22/02/2012 07:56 - United Kingdom

Today, I called the toaster a "cheeky thing" for being done before the kettle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 510

You deserved it 23 310

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Same thing different taste

It's toast

By Crying - 16/04/2017 02:00

Today, I no longer have a toaster. My younger sister put it in the bath because apparently it looked dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 786

You deserved it 371

By thebravelittletoaster - 20/03/2011 20:32 - United Kingdom

Today, the estranged crumbs in my toaster caught light while I was making breakfast. The toast, toaster, and my wooden bench are now little more than collateral damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 376

You deserved it 9 864

By latter - 24/09/2013 00:05 - United States - Middle River

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 338

You deserved it 3 312

By Anonymous - 07/04/2014 17:02 - Canada

Today, I noticed something written on the top of my toaster, so I used a finger to clear away some of the crumbs, burning my finger in the process. The writing? "CAUTION: Hot surface!" Thanks, toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 011

You deserved it 48 817

By thatchick3333 - 08/03/2012 07:13 - United States

Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 495

You deserved it 6 973

Freakout

By Anonymous - 06/08/2013 06:19 - United States

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand when I shouted, "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 301

You deserved it 9 822

By purplexangel - 02/08/2012 17:32 - United States - Lubbock

Today, I tried to stand by my toaster and train myself to not jump when it popped up. Not only did I jump, I also knocked the toaster off the counter and onto my toes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 885

You deserved it 22 563

Student life

By gofixmyhead - 30/08/2011 14:53 - United Kingdom

Today, in the flat I share with four students, I broke our toaster. The night before, they'd successfully managed to toast chicken soup-covered crumpets in it whilst drunk. I tried to toast a teacake, and the whole thing exploded in flames and smoke. Our toaster got taken out by a raisin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 150

You deserved it 4 021

Depressing

By bymyself - 07/02/2011 02:05

Today, the nicest thing said to me all day was from my microwave, which flashes "Enjoy your meal" when it finishes cooking something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 669

You deserved it 3 842

By anon - 14/01/2013 03:00 - United States - Dublin

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 973

You deserved it 3 682

Redoxx_fml 22

Wednesday 22 February 2012 15:56

You sir are a dandy

Pelreskovich 11

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:00

That rapscallion of a toaster!

Comments

LivsterA 0

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:30

What? This makes no sense!

FUDGE99 5

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:34

Oh, you cheeky thing...

jumpshot32 11

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:34

So how is this a FML? Did it burn your toast as well?

rillastyle 1

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:34

So...?

choshaki 8

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:34

Whatever makes you happy OP! :)

strokesie 23

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:35

Are you fifty?

ohreallynow1992 3

Wednesday 22 February 2012 16:46

Why is this on FML? It seems more like an MLIA post to me..

IronCOG117SR 4

Wednesday 22 February 2012 21:42

That's not even an FML, it's just funny!

KiddNYC1O 20

Wednesday 22 February 2012 22:00

I usually say dirty things when it burns me.

stormchaser24 24

Wednesday 22 February 2012 22:05

So you are going to tell the Internet. Oh no.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 328

You deserved it 18 803

Today, my sister pointed out a weird black mass underneath the lace of my dress. Perplexed, I looked down to inspect further and discover a wasp, under my boobs, attempting to build a nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 062

You deserved it 1 295

Today, I lost my job. Why? Because I'm taking care of my dying mother. My boss actually said, "Well, if she dies today, we can hold your job." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 109

Today, it was my second day working as a cashier in a drug store. I thought everything went great, but by the end of my shift, my cash register was $10 short. Maybe it wouldn't be that bad if on my first day it hadn't been $30 short. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 885

You deserved it 3 160

Today, at the supermarket, a woman came up to me and said I looked just like her son, who was killed in Afghanistan. She tearfully asked if she could hug me "one last time." It was a little weird, but I let her. Ten minutes later, at the checkout, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 760

You deserved it 5 296

Today, I found out that my boyfriend thinks brushing his teeth is unnecessary, because, "the world is going to end because of climate change anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 945

You deserved it 215

Same thing different taste

It's toast

Freakout

Student life

Depressing

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